My soul hurts. Seeing her today, she was so beautiful. Even more than I had remembered.What was the most painful was after all the legal wrangling, there was this awkward moment where she stuck out her hand with her lip quivering, her eyes full of unshed tears. I reached out and pulled her close, crushing her to my chest. It was incredible how quickly it all came rushing back. In that instant, despite all the months apart, I was home. Her head was pressed against her spot on my chest just like it did then. My arms wrapped around her and I whispered in her ear that I was sorry and that I didn't want this. That was when it all turned to shit. Those tears began to trickle down her face and I was nearly undone. We talked for a while longer about that beautiful little girl that we made and brought up keeping in touch and possibly trying to work things out.
There's a piece of me that wants nothing more than to try to rebuild a life together with her even as our marriage ends. What the fuck is wrong with me?
There's a piece of me that wants nothing more than to try to rebuild a life together with her even as our marriage ends. What the fuck is wrong with me?
fuck:
Dude, thats hard but I understand. I wasn't married but coming out my last relationship like almost 2 years ago now. I totally felt how you felt. Everything around her and I was brutally painful but even when we hugged goodbye it still felt right. I think that's natural. You're still comfortable there and you spent probably a lot of time together and made your lives fit in to one piece. You'll get over it. I did. I'm still friends with her brother and her sister and have to see her occasionally due to that. We talk and its cordial but now that I've moved on to someone else who is an amazingly better person overall I look back at that and think to myself, I'm glad its over. I'm not going to say it will be easy but you'll get through it.