It's hard to stand up straight when you world is continuously turned topsy-turvy.
Yesterday I experienced one of those conversations that totally blindsides you, and leaves you questioning just where your life is going. Out of a bit of depression, and a longing to talk to someone special, I called one of my former girlfriends with whom I'm still on friendly terms. She was one... Read More
Things are improving slowly. I need to clear up things for myself. Deal with issues I have.
It's been a good run. I've enjoyed what this site had, people I've met, and the things I've done, but I think I've got to step away from this site. I'm going to let my account expire in May. I'll be on here occasionally from now till then.... Read More
Fuck! It hurts. I can't listen to music, every stupid song reminds me of her, even the ones I don't like. It's ironic how the songs or artists you shared seem to be the ones that play the most often. I can't watch movies, because I find some connection there that seemingly applies to us. If only I did this more when we were together.... Read More
Well thats sad.
Im sorry youre feeling that way! I am usually really good at advice, but never have been good at the heartbreak side of it... Time somehow always does heal though.
I dont know the story... but I hope it gets better
Okay, I take back the first part; I do have words of wisdom:
First off, don't let this destroy you. I mean, I'm not gonna tell you not to wallow; by all means, do! Play it over and over in your head and cry a lot, bawl at the stupidest songs, let the night get to you -- it's the only way your brain is going to work through it all -- but keep doing that daytime stuff, don't let the misery take over completely. Time heals all wounds, so the saying goes. Yadda, yadda...
But here's the gem/pearl/whatever among my somethings of wisdom: it wasn't meant to be. Now, I don't mean that in the astrological or will-of-the-gods sort of way -- but if Fate is what you're into, then grab hold of that for all it's worth -- rather I mean the basic human psychology and odd twists of the cosmos sort of way. Here, let me tell you a story...
Nearly every woman I've dated I thought was "The One". Yeah, I know... But the thing was, I should have known, because the relationships were always such a struggle; I mean, I had to really fight to get those women to stick with me. But then one day I meet this lovely lady and we start dating and it's like KAPOW! we just fall into each other. There's no struggle. There's no fight to keep her. She wants to be with me. She says all the right things. She does all the right things. She's perfect. And she tells me she loves me. I start daydreaming about how happy and perfect my life finally is going to be.
And then she was gone. Just like that. Poof... And sometime the next year she was married to somebody else. I couldn't believe it. For months after she first left I walked around in a daze, thinking maybe it was just some mistake, that she would come back. I second-guessed myself; if only I'd done this or said such-n-such. I went through all the stages of grief. Eventually I was angry. I wanted to destroy the world; that's how bad I felt.
And eventually, finally, I accepted it. It wasn't meant to be. Something caused her to reexamine the relationship, and then to move on. She's still married to the guy; and I met and married TheFox. In your case, she met someone else. That sucks. That really sucks. But would you have her stay?
We're like puzzle pieces, our personalities and our relationships. Some are deceptively close in fit, but still not quite right. Some people are fine with not quite right. Some people aren't. Better to find out before you make something legally binding. Two years was it? That's a long time by modern standards. Your pain is valid. So caress your misery right now, but keep an eye to the dawn, to the horizon. There are other fish in the sea. I hate that saying, but it's true. Keep your chin up. If we are anything, we humans, it is persistent (really; I can even give you evolutionary anthropological proof! )
Anywho, if I were in Asheville I'd take you out for a beer and a good cry. Take care.
I don't know what to do. I feel so alone now. Warning ! This next rant is about relationships, so be careful it might get sappy. I'm just posting this because it's two in the morning and I can't sleep. I'm not writing this to get pity, I just need to get things off my chest.
Oh sweetie I am so sorry. I know getting back on the horse, swimming and looking for those other fish in the sea just seems so daunting.
You are one hell of a catch, and trust me when I say this was HER loss. She was good practice, and I just know when you are not looking or climbing back on, the right one will be there waiting to get noticed.
We love you so hang on!!
And thank you for the comment on my braces removal.
The only way I can figure I got it is that Marksy has been cutting down brush and stumps and stuff for the new disc golf course, it got on his clothes or hands and then got on me.
It only takes a minuscule drop of urushiol to cause a rash.
Yeah, the Peepshow was great. Heather is gorgeous! There were probably about 50 or so people here to see them. Still, I would have thought there would be more.
It's winter storm round two. This past one doesn't seem so bad, here in Asheville at least. It wasn't as much snow as the first, and it mixed in with some freezing rain. It gave the snow a hard shell reminiscent of the shell on crme brule. It also cracks similarly when you walk on it.
I love the snow. I'm still a kid when... Read More
I think I'm on the verge of a mid-life crisis. I want to sell my stuff and disappear, or circumnavigate the globe. I'm starting to feel trapped in Asheville. Trapped in my comfort and routine. It's not that Asheville is a bad place to live, I am very active and have many friends here, but I feel I'm going nowhere. Projects, commitments, and jobs keep... Read More
I think those thoughts are very normal for a creative person, and I can't deny that I have them sometimes. When I was younger I thought settling or putting down roots was the worst thing, and toxic to creativity. But I eventually realized that I would always procrastinate when it comes to pursuing my dreams, no matter if I'm married with a house or living "free" and roaming. So now I just choose to do what makes me happy and live in the moment. And oddly, settling down has made me happier than I've ever been. Though granted, I still have a lifestyle that seems abnormal to my neighbors.
I would say find out what makes you happy, whether it's wandering, being "upwardly mobile", having a family, whatever. There are a lot of different ways to be a happy grown-up.
I know exactly what you are going through and it sucks. All I ever have been able to do though is push through what I can and change the small things. It'll work itself out in the end, hopefully for the best for you. Thanks for the comment and best wishes.
Here we are at the end of another year. The end of a decade in fact. How did that happen? It's true what my parents say, It all goes by so fast. I spent New Year's 2000 in Asheville working at the Grove Park Inn. Here it is ten years later, and I'm still here, but in a far different place than back then. Still... Read More
wOw, Mexico looks much nicer than when i was there last... but i was in a suburb of Monterrey where the houses were built from shipping pallets and they had no running water. three cheers for Barritos though. (my favorite flavors are apple and pineapple) ..... i have not played in Ashebille but will be sure to bring my "equipment" on my next visit.
But the thing was, I should have known, because the relationships were always such a struggle; I mean, I had to really fight to get those women to stick with me. But then one day I meet this lovely lady and we start dating and it's like KAPOW! we just fall into each other. There's no struggle. There's no fight to keep her. She wants to be with me. She says all the right things. She does all the right things. She's perfect. And she tells me she loves me. I start daydreaming about how happy and perfect my life finally is going to be.
I couldn't believe it. For months after she first left I walked around in a daze, thinking maybe it was just some mistake, that she would come back. I second-guessed myself; if only I'd done this or said such-n-such. I went through all the stages of grief. Eventually I was angry. I wanted to destroy the world; that's how bad I felt.
)
All I can say is: don't give up. +1 to what ^^schiavona^^ said.