Okay, so in case ya'll have not noticed, I have been looking for a 'boyfriend', um hello I had a dating profile on this thing and eveything...So, my comments being made about the different guys I've been seeing are in relation to that. There seems to be a general confusion from the peanut gallery out there, so I thought I would put it in black and white.... 
PLease don't take offense when I bag on the boys. Believe me they deserve it 
PLease don't take offense when I bag on the boys. Believe me they deserve it
BOY FRIEND APPLICATION
General questions:
First Name:
Middle Name:
Last Name:
Suffix:
Birthdate:
Current Address:
Phone #:
Social Security Number:
Drivers license number:
Credit Score:
Blood Type:
Birthplace:
Height:
Weight:
Hair Color:
Eye Color:
Race/National Origin:
Occupation:
Job Title/Employer:
Year, Make & Model of vehicle:
Marital Status:
Relationship Status:
Have you ever been convicted of a felony?
If yes, please explain:
Are you authorized to work in the US?
If no, please explain:
Are there any outstanding debts against you?
Have you had a bankruptcy or judgment against you?
Relationship History:
Name of last relationship:
Dates of relationship:
Reason for leaving:
Name of last relationship:
Dates of relationship:
Reason for leaving:
Name of last relationship:
Dates of relationship:
Reason for leaving:
Education:
Elementary School:
Jr. High:
High School:
College (and Major):
Skills and Talents:
1) Can you tie a cherry stem in a knot with your tongue?
2) How long can you hold your breath for?
3) Can you balance a broom on your chin?
4) Can you balance a spoon on your nose?
5) Can you burp the entire alphabet?
6) (Would you ever do it in public?)
7) Can you touch your tongue to your nose?
8) Can you wiggle your ears?
9) Can you leap tall buildings in a single bound?
10) How many licks does it take YOU to get to the center of a tootsie pop?
Medical History:
1) When was your last medical examination?
2) Do you have all your shots?
3) Do you have any serious health problems?
4) If yes, please explain:
5) Do you currently or have you ever had a sexually transmitted disease?
6) If yes, do you still have it, and what is it?
7) Have you ever had mono or the kissing disease?
8) Have you ever broken a bone?
9) If yes, what have you broken?
10) Do you wet the bed?
Personal Questions:
1) Have you ever been in love?
2) Do you have any children?
3) If yes, how many, and with how many women?
4) Have you ever been with a man?
5) If yes, did you give or receive?
6) Do you ever want to get married?
7) Do you want children?
8) If yes, how many?
9) What kind of music do you listen to?
10) Have you ever loved someone so much it made you cry?
11) Do you have any piercings or tattoos?
12) If yes, where and what?
13) Have you ever been to Europe?
14) What religion do you follow?
15) Do you follow it closely?
16) Whats your favorite food?
17) How many people have you had sex with?
20) Do you have any pets?
21) How many pets have you had sex with?
22) Where do you see yourself in 10 years?
23) What do you want to be when you grow up?
24) Do you bathe or shower daily?
25) What is your favorite episode of South Park?
26) Bush or Gore?
27) Coke or Pepsi?
28) Paper or plastic?
29) Have you ever shaved or dyed your pubic hair?
30) Have you ever sold drugs?
31) Have you ever done drugs?
32) If yes, what and when?
33) What is your favorite ice cream flavor?
34) Are your parents still married?
35) Do you have any brothers or sisters?
36) If yes, ages, names?
37) Have you ever or do you still play Dungeons and Dragons?
38) If yes, please stop now. I have no room in my life for 12 sided dice.
39) Did you camp out outside of the movie theatre when Episode 1 came out?
40) How important is valentines day to you?
41) What size shoe do you wear?
42) What size pants do you wear?
43) What size shirt do you wear?
44) Have you ever measured your member?
45) If yes, what was the outcome?
46) Ok, now tell me the truth.
47) What is your favorite movie?
48) What is your favorite album?
49) What is your favorite color?
50) Favorite TV show?
51) Favorite store?
52) Favorite season?
53) Favorite cast member of Friends?
54) Favorite body part?
55) Favorite scent?
56) Favorite alcoholic drink?
57) Favorite toy as a child?
58) Favorite place anywhere in the world?
59) Favorite swear word?
60) Favorite fruit?
61) Favorite vegetable?
62) Favorite sport?
63) Favorite shoes?
64) Best concert you have ever been to?
65) Have you ever ice skated?
66) Have you ever rollerbladed?
67) Have you ever skateboarded?
68) Have you ever snowboarded?
69) Have you ever surfed?
70) What do you want to name your children?
71) Where do you want to spend the rest of your life?
72) Have you ever cheated on someone?
73) Has anyone ever cheated on you?
74) Are you allergic to anything?
75) Playboy or Hustler?
76) Are you a legs, butt or breast man?
77) Boxers, briefs, or commando?
78) Are you racist?
79) Are you homophobic?
80) What is your favorite sexual position?
81) How old were you when you lost your virginity?
82) What would be the perfect date?
83) Have you ever lied to someone you were dating about your age?
84) If yes, what were the circumstances?
85) Have you ever had sex with someone who you did not know their name?
86) Have you ever been to jail?
87) Do you have a history of mental illness?
88) Do you smoke?
89) Do you drink?
90) Are you a pothead, Focker?
91) Have you ever stalked anyone?
92) Have you killed anyone?
93) Have you ever had a one night stand?
94) Have you ever hooked up with an underage female?
95) Have you ever hooked up with a much older woman?
96) Do you have any strange fetishes?
97) Have you ever duct taped anyone?
98) And lock them in a closet?
99) Are you a sick motherfucker?
100) Are you glad this is finally over?
(if you are interested in the position, copy and paste application (attach a picture) and email it to (fill in your email address here)
Yeah for boy friends!! Boo to most boys, some of the time occaissionly.