And I find myself in a bit of a quandary. I just found out that my ex-fiance's grandmother has passed away, and it looks like her grandfather and great aunt may both be only a few days behind. I absolutely adored (and still do) all three of them. I'd like to go to the funeral(s) once scheduled, but therein lies the problem.
I broke up with my ex after eight years together because I wanted to have kids and she absolutely refused. She killed herself that night. I never loved her any less. The decision was made with my head, not my heart. Neither one of us could give the other what we needed and i wanted the best for her. Her suicide led me down a spiral of self-destruction that ultimately ended with a shotgun in my own mouth. The thought of my family receiving a similar phonecall was the only thing that kept me from pulling the trigger. Now I find myself in a world where my current wife hates anything to do with my ex, despite never having met her, and my ex's surviving sisters would prefer I never existed.
Obviously, I will not take my wife to the funeral, but I do feel somewhat obligated to go myself. Part of me wants to respect her sisters and not go, solely out of the love I still have for her. Part of me wants to say fuck it, I'm allowed togive my respects to the dead whether they like it or not.
I broke up with my ex after eight years together because I wanted to have kids and she absolutely refused. She killed herself that night. I never loved her any less. The decision was made with my head, not my heart. Neither one of us could give the other what we needed and i wanted the best for her. Her suicide led me down a spiral of self-destruction that ultimately ended with a shotgun in my own mouth. The thought of my family receiving a similar phonecall was the only thing that kept me from pulling the trigger. Now I find myself in a world where my current wife hates anything to do with my ex, despite never having met her, and my ex's surviving sisters would prefer I never existed.
Obviously, I will not take my wife to the funeral, but I do feel somewhat obligated to go myself. Part of me wants to respect her sisters and not go, solely out of the love I still have for her. Part of me wants to say fuck it, I'm allowed togive my respects to the dead whether they like it or not.
If anything, make a charitable donation to a suicide help program in the family's honor. You would be helping others, avoiding needless confrontation, and it's probably the best apology you could make to your ex's family.