ohash

I have been in a terrible mood since Monday night. I'm going back to work tomorrow after being off since Friday and I'm so glad. I think it's the time off that really does me in. When I have no purpose and nothing to do, I get frustrated. My life is boring, really. Maybe I just need to make myself more boring so I feel like I fit in my own life.

I head back to class again in a week, which is exciting. I am much less nervous than I was at the start of last quarter. I am actually looking forward to starting back again. Yes, it makes my days long, but with work and school and homework I'm never really bored. I have class M-Th until 7:30.

I posted a filthy, dirty, smutty story in the group of the same name last night. I still am not sure why I did it. Yes, those stories float around in my head pretty much constantly, but I've never had the nerve to share one. I guess at 5am I have more courage. Haha.

Oh, and I don't like needing people. I don't like it one bit. Makes me feel desperate and terrified of losing them. I dislike feeling that way...and I try to make it so that I don't need anyone...but it doesn't work out. I end up being a big squishy sap.

There's lots of thoughts floating around in my head tonight. Some are actually quite funny and make me smile...but I just don't have the energy to share. I think I'll just hit the shower and go to bed.