nonameninja

well what a day. didn't get much sleep. made pizza like a mad man. bought a cd for the first time in a long time (the new apc enjoying it although its very different) also bought some video games because I got pay. found a car to get me around have a test drive tomarrow hope all god well. I could be off my feet in a few days. got to see my bro as well. added some car pics to my profile. got bord. oh that right I only had one of the most painful conversations of my hole life tonight. spent 6 hours talking to my best and only real friend about how I will need therpiy for the next 10 years to just be....ok. sorry have a lot of issues. and it was probably the second time I've come out of my shell and told someone how I really feel about me and life and all my crasy ness. very depressing. tones of crying (ya thats right I'm a guy that crys but I'm not puss I could still kick your dogs ass....maybe) so ya lots of cratching my soul and bleeding my heart. nice to have someone to do that with...oh ya and whats that?? shes moving away...ya. not saprized its what happened after the last time I had such a conversation. then they both told me they loved me. and well the first one fucked me over bad on her way out doubling all the damage she fixed. if that happens again I'm becoming a mute. but at least she just moving and not dieing. I swear if I have to deal with another death....good god. 4 friends in a year. that fucked plus 4 famliy members the year before. I'm about ready to headbutt death...syth or no syth that mothers going down!!!