Sometimes I feel so cheap and used, but it's all my fault.
I guess I just don't know how to say no to him...but then I end up closing my eyes or not making eye contact and I can just step outside myself.
It's not me there on the bed, it's just my body. I cheapen myself because I dunno how to tell him I'm so used to having no choice in the matter that the lie I tell myself ("no really, you enjoy this") has become reality. I'm afraid of what may happen if I say no.
Arg. Baggage. Yuck.
I guess I just don't know how to say no to him...but then I end up closing my eyes or not making eye contact and I can just step outside myself.
It's not me there on the bed, it's just my body. I cheapen myself because I dunno how to tell him I'm so used to having no choice in the matter that the lie I tell myself ("no really, you enjoy this") has become reality. I'm afraid of what may happen if I say no.
Arg. Baggage. Yuck.
fadedorion:
Tell him for both of your sakes.