I want a raise.
I want to go home.
I want sex.
I want a COOKIE.
repeat.
this makes me feel good.
I want to go home.
I want sex.
I want a COOKIE.
repeat.
this makes me feel good.
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
i'm more amused with myself and my ridiculous childish immature self inflicted pain. the end.
so what's the point?...
so what's the point?...
citrus:
i fantasize about minimalization and reading as my sole entertainment.
but i'm much too scatterbrain for that idea.
nice ideal, though...
~~~~~~
good question.
we can share scars in a few days.
holy shit.
[Edited on Aug 06, 2003]
i sometimes think of how lovely it will be when i have stacks and stacks of books i've read, and those books are the pedestals for furniture, ya know...
like, plywood supported by stacks of books to serve as bookshelves.
interesting. lol.
[Edited on Aug 06, 2003]
but i'm much too scatterbrain for that idea.
nice ideal, though...
~~~~~~
good question.
we can share scars in a few days.
holy shit.
[Edited on Aug 06, 2003]
i sometimes think of how lovely it will be when i have stacks and stacks of books i've read, and those books are the pedestals for furniture, ya know...
like, plywood supported by stacks of books to serve as bookshelves.
interesting. lol.
[Edited on Aug 06, 2003]
I was thinking why don't I have any favorite books on the left there <--- hm... It's not like I don't "have" books that i like. It's probably the ones that I really like wouldn't make any sense to anyone or at least their titles wouldn't. Plus I think my literary tastes change every few years as I grow up... Things that absolutely bore the...
Read More
Read More
no, thaks.
citrus:
words.
[Edited on Aug 05, 2003]
mostly he just listened. not much to say, i guess....
he doesn't know you any better than i do. that he hopes we have a good time.
are you sure you wouldn't rather know what I had to tell him?
just that i don't know lots about you, but you seem cool...
and they think it's awesome that i'm roaming around meeting people i don't know...
mom's whole thing about strangers, you know
[Edited on Aug 05, 2003]
[Edited on Aug 05, 2003]
mostly he just listened. not much to say, i guess....
he doesn't know you any better than i do. that he hopes we have a good time.
are you sure you wouldn't rather know what I had to tell him?
just that i don't know lots about you, but you seem cool...
and they think it's awesome that i'm roaming around meeting people i don't know...
mom's whole thing about strangers, you know
[Edited on Aug 05, 2003]
invisigirl:
i read your previous journal....
we all want to think that people we love have never done freaky shit before meeting us, but the truth is, we've done some pretty freaky shit ourselves--but somehow that's ok, right? haha we're all only human. freaky shit happens.
listen to the EBTG song- Fascination.
we all want to think that people we love have never done freaky shit before meeting us, but the truth is, we've done some pretty freaky shit ourselves--but somehow that's ok, right? haha we're all only human. freaky shit happens.
listen to the EBTG song- Fascination.
There is something I've been thinking about for the last couple of days and I can't get it out of my head. And it's something I'm not sure people could relate to or understand. And it's not that relevant. But maybe if I write it down it will go away...
Sometime ago there was a girl I fell in love with
and it didn't last...
Read More
Sometime ago there was a girl I fell in love with
and it didn't last...
Read More
evanx:
Hey dude, that sucks. But I know how you feel. I had still hung out with an ex, and stories like that just make you want to shoot yourself. I found the best way to get over it is to purge all of those thoughts of her out of your brain. It ain't easy.
Watching "Swingers" always made me feel better.
Watching "Swingers" always made me feel better.
citrus:
people are strange.
maybe she just wanted to be better than the other girl or something.
we look for acceptance in all the wrong places some times.
no peace with out.
~~~~
p.s.
no one makes us anything we're not already...
but i'm so glad you're happy sometimes.
and that maybe i got a smile out of you... *raised eyebrows*
[Edited on Aug 05, 2003]
and:
oh,
well that's okay.
you like this place because it talks back, right?
well... i try to put myself in her shoes... just for a second, right?
and then... i'm not trying to offer excuses. there's certainly not a good one.
you're more than welcome to continue ripping her head off.
but i will try to be quiet about it next time, eh?... as difficult as that may be.
nevermind. i don't want to make that promise, but i don't want you to be conscious of anyone's response...
would draining your brain of thoughts of her help either?!
[Edited on Aug 05, 2003]
i tell you i don't have answers... not ones good enough for me, so certainly not good enough for you because you deserve better than what i've got.
blah blah
ultimately i don't know.
but i think it's only your problem so far as you let it bother you.
it is definitely an intimate sharing. what is the real source of the anger? did you want her to be yours? is that a problem?
why would you be disgusted that you love a person who disappoints you? because of that silly line in a movie (how great was that?!?) about how we are what we love?
well just think: if you can love the very least of them, what capacity do you have to love the best.
it's good that love doesn't often discriminate. but you have no power/control/manipulative abilities for something that happened already.
when do we stop torturing ourselves?
[Edited on Aug 05, 2003]
see,
you share this because it's bothering you... and i go to pick it apart like i can do something to make it better.
and what i'm doing is challenging you to make it stop when if it were so simply to quit it, if we had already overcome that challenge, the idea would no longer be a big deal, right?
i'm just convinced that anger is indicative of fear.
[Edited on Aug 05, 2003]
maybe she just wanted to be better than the other girl or something.
we look for acceptance in all the wrong places some times.
no peace with out.
~~~~
p.s.
no one makes us anything we're not already...
but i'm so glad you're happy sometimes.
and that maybe i got a smile out of you... *raised eyebrows*
[Edited on Aug 05, 2003]
and:
oh,
well that's okay.
you like this place because it talks back, right?
well... i try to put myself in her shoes... just for a second, right?
and then... i'm not trying to offer excuses. there's certainly not a good one.
you're more than welcome to continue ripping her head off.
but i will try to be quiet about it next time, eh?... as difficult as that may be.
nevermind. i don't want to make that promise, but i don't want you to be conscious of anyone's response...
would draining your brain of thoughts of her help either?!
[Edited on Aug 05, 2003]
i tell you i don't have answers... not ones good enough for me, so certainly not good enough for you because you deserve better than what i've got.
blah blah
ultimately i don't know.
but i think it's only your problem so far as you let it bother you.
it is definitely an intimate sharing. what is the real source of the anger? did you want her to be yours? is that a problem?
why would you be disgusted that you love a person who disappoints you? because of that silly line in a movie (how great was that?!?) about how we are what we love?
well just think: if you can love the very least of them, what capacity do you have to love the best.
it's good that love doesn't often discriminate. but you have no power/control/manipulative abilities for something that happened already.
when do we stop torturing ourselves?
[Edited on Aug 05, 2003]
see,
you share this because it's bothering you... and i go to pick it apart like i can do something to make it better.
and what i'm doing is challenging you to make it stop when if it were so simply to quit it, if we had already overcome that challenge, the idea would no longer be a big deal, right?
i'm just convinced that anger is indicative of fear.
[Edited on Aug 05, 2003]
I went to see Whale Rider
last night at it was a good movie. I even shed
some tears or something... oh, and I don't remember when, maybe a couple of days ago I had a dream that my friends list was all gray... So today
I was pleasantly surprised to see it unchanged...
1. That's not right that i'm having dreams about this.
2....
Read More
last night at it was a good movie. I even shed
some tears or something... oh, and I don't remember when, maybe a couple of days ago I had a dream that my friends list was all gray... So today
I was pleasantly surprised to see it unchanged...
1. That's not right that i'm having dreams about this.
2....
Read More
citrus:
lol
do we need to get a life or what?
i am SO excited.
(love a boy that can cry for an evocative movie... so emo )
i wink too much, especially since i'm not a winker. gaw.
i am smiling SO MUCH right now.
i have to shop tonight or i will never get it done. but i want to go home and water my plants.
i feel so mean that i've asked the boy to take care of them while i'm gone, but i think i may just bring them inside and turn the air to around 75 so they'll stay nice.
he's the most responsible person in my neighborhood that i know and making that statement is a sad sad reflection.
you're gonna look spiffy, so i want to at least look... presentable.
i tell you i was tempted to show up in house-clothes (dammit, more winking)... hopefully, you'll get my tone irl and i won't have to do that cheez-schmo winking thing.
hehehehe.
i am acting ridiculous, misha.
(also, you don't have to return silly messages like the one i left you sunday. but thank you! )
omgoodness.
oh, but i think you SHOULD wear the tux, so i can tell who you are
this winking has GOT to stop. it's not even funny to ME anymore.
and for your information, i like to wear skirts A LOT... it's just comfy. not sticking to the crotch like pants, and if i get hot, i can just stand outside with my legs shoulder-width apart and let the breeze make it better. and i can sit crosslegged in style and comfort.
i'm not dressing up for YOU... psha (hehehe)
oh this is gonna be FUN, huh?
but i'm sad you'll have to work on a SATURDAY!
[Edited on Aug 04, 2003]
do we need to get a life or what?
i am SO excited.
(love a boy that can cry for an evocative movie... so emo
)
i wink too much, especially since i'm not a winker. gaw.
i am smiling SO MUCH right now.
i have to shop tonight or i will never get it done. but i want to go home and water my plants.
i feel so mean that i've asked the boy to take care of them while i'm gone, but i think i may just bring them inside and turn the air to around 75 so they'll stay nice.
he's the most responsible person in my neighborhood that i know and making that statement is a sad sad reflection.
you're gonna look spiffy, so i want to at least look... presentable.
i tell you i was tempted to show up in house-clothes
(dammit, more winking)... hopefully, you'll get my tone irl and i won't have to do that cheez-schmo winking thing.
hehehehe.
i am acting ridiculous, misha.
(also, you don't have to return silly messages like the one i left you sunday. but thank you!
)
omgoodness.
oh, but i think you SHOULD wear the tux, so i can tell who you are
this winking has GOT to stop. it's not even funny to ME anymore.
and for your information, i like to wear skirts A LOT... it's just comfy. not sticking to the crotch like pants, and if i get hot, i can just stand outside with my legs shoulder-width apart and let the breeze make it better. and i can sit crosslegged in style and comfort.
i'm not dressing up for YOU... psha (hehehe)
oh this is gonna be FUN, huh?
but i'm sad you'll have to work on a SATURDAY!
[Edited on Aug 04, 2003]
grayblue:
all of your friends were me? aw, i feel so special.. and slightly scared...
I'm talking too much lately and confusing the hell
out of myself... Now I want to be silent for a week.
out of myself... Now I want to be silent for a week.
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
mitsou:
couldn't agree with you more about Nostalghia, it also helps that I have a soft spot for 'slow' movies.
csilla:
ugh i feel the same way. way too much talking. sometimes silence can work wonders.
i can never keep my mouth shit though....
hope you are well
xoxo csilla
i can never keep my mouth shit though....
hope you are well
xoxo csilla
I have a movie for every night... Last night it was
the "Pianist" the latest Roman Polanski situation...
I started watching it, and I just couldn't... I can't
bring myself to watch movies like that... Such a pussy, you might say... Well, I said the same thing to myself, got drunk and started watching it again. This time successfully. The best part of that movie...
Read More
the "Pianist" the latest Roman Polanski situation...
I started watching it, and I just couldn't... I can't
bring myself to watch movies like that... Such a pussy, you might say... Well, I said the same thing to myself, got drunk and started watching it again. This time successfully. The best part of that movie...
Read More
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
adelina:
By the way, have you read Kurkov's Death and the Penguin? There is a character named Misha the Penguin in the book. I figure that's where you got your name hehe
hehe
mistressmissy:
when i grow up huh?
well umm what are you doing august 7th?
well umm what are you doing august 7th?
how would you in one sentence express overwhelming rage and a complete inability to do anything about it? When things spin out of control and take on their own path? When you say things to people that make them realize what an asshole you are? When it makes you realize the same thing?
Moments like that make it clear how
hypocritical I am... I've had...
Read More
Moments like that make it clear how
hypocritical I am... I've had...
Read More
bettietwoguns:
i try to pretend i'm not hyprocritical. i rarely let myself see that others are giving to me. then again, sometimes i really DON'T see it . . .
No Time to fuck
But you like the rush
And where would we be
without sums
Deals we make
Brown paper bag
makes for a hat
when it rains on
your head mate
cheers for that
when the world
stops for snow
when you laugh
I'm inside
your mouth
sucking the sun
baboons and birds
with the weight
of you dear
I forgot
- -...
Read More
But you like the rush
And where would we be
without sums
Deals we make
Brown paper bag
makes for a hat
when it rains on
your head mate
cheers for that
when the world
stops for snow
when you laugh
I'm inside
your mouth
sucking the sun
baboons and birds
with the weight
of you dear
I forgot
- -...
Read More
citrus:
so you should be.
but i say (this is just my ideal - so it doesn't really count for shit) find people who don't remind so much.
i have an idea that people may be attracted to the opposite sex that reminds them of self. maybe. it's just an idea. i look at couples and smirk that their features are so similar.
i take it back. not true. i don't think any of my exes look like me. gah, i hope not.
i'm struck with the horny thing. it fucking sucks. i mean, it feels nice to be horny... doesn't feel nice that i won't do anything about it. whatever.
i'm not fucking married people, remember... or i suppose i could easily remedy.
why is it that dirty old men do so much coming on? married men... am i some kind of stale situation refreshment or something.
~~~~~
FUCKING A MISHA!
excuse the language.
i watched adaptation on sunday. the night before last.
i liked it a lot.
i want to read the orchid theif, but it's all checked out.
i love the line you fed me. you are what you love. which is good to find truth in because i want to be "everything" and i generally find myself in love with "everything"...
and then i watched a rerun of this (all that jazz) and have a new crush. he sings a song about rainbows and i swoon because i want to be a rainbow, too.
i'm so full of it sometimes.
about schmidt was almost boring but endearing. i love movies about a day in the life. another one - "all or nothing". i cried and cried.
i will call you tonight. it's my turn
i will also call heather again.
[Edited on Jul 29, 2003]
but i say (this is just my ideal - so it doesn't really count for shit) find people who don't remind so much.
i have an idea that people may be attracted to the opposite sex that reminds them of self. maybe. it's just an idea. i look at couples and smirk that their features are so similar.
i take it back. not true. i don't think any of my exes look like me. gah, i hope not.
i'm struck with the horny thing. it fucking sucks. i mean, it feels nice to be horny... doesn't feel nice that i won't do anything about it. whatever.
i'm not fucking married people, remember... or i suppose i could easily remedy.
why is it that dirty old men do so much coming on? married men... am i some kind of stale situation refreshment or something.
~~~~~
FUCKING A MISHA!
excuse the language.
i watched adaptation on sunday. the night before last.
i liked it a lot.
i want to read the orchid theif, but it's all checked out.
i love the line you fed me. you are what you love. which is good to find truth in because i want to be "everything" and i generally find myself in love with "everything"...
and then i watched a rerun of this (all that jazz) and have a new crush. he sings a song about rainbows and i swoon because i want to be a rainbow, too.
i'm so full of it sometimes.
about schmidt was almost boring but endearing. i love movies about a day in the life. another one - "all or nothing". i cried and cried.
i will call you tonight. it's my turn
i will also call heather again.
[Edited on Jul 29, 2003]
mistressmissy:
are you gonna come see me tomorrow? *gives your the pouty puppy eyes*
my computer is kinda busted right now
perfect day for it yeah
we still ended up going though.
wish i couldve met you.
next time.
and you MUST come to my birthday party
i'm at home (and in bed)
i'm iffy on sex...
i had a brownie...
satisfaction is still not present...