mirima

It doesn't matter where my heart is leading me at the moment, cause he's coming to visit whether or not I'm ready for him...and I will melt, and probably spontaneously combust when I see him. Something tells me this is the direction I should be going...this is good for me, its safe, its home. I know it doesn't make much sense, what with him living four hours away...there are a lot of others that would make much more sense...but because it doesn't make sense is why I trust it. I trust what doesn't come natural to me...I trust what isn't normal. I feel that is what home is for me...something that's disfunctional, and confusing, and something that hurts...because life is pain, and there will always be pain...but without that pain, you cannot see the beauty behind it unfold.
I am ready for this. I'm confused, I'm hurt (mostly by myself), and I'm scared...but something tells me this is the way to go. And I shall follow this path wherever it leads me...until there is no more path to follow. Then I shall follow another path that doesn't make any sense, cause that's how I live.
This is my life...welcome.