metal_ralph

So, I work at a science library. Though we're attached to a university, in theory we are a private library, but we maintain public hours, and consequently we deal not only with university students, but public users as well.

And we get a lot of...loonies.

This particular story isn't mine, I must confess, but rather a friend's. He's working a shift at a particularly slow point in the day (they are all relatively slow - the need for endochronology journals not being what it once was,) and he gets a phone call at the desk. Normally, people will call asking for directions, or for building hours, or some other type of general information. That day, however, this was not the case. What follows is a transcript of the conversation as it was related to me:

Friend: "Hello, this is the *** Library, can I help you?"
Patron: "Yes. Do you have the answers?"
Friend: "Sorry? Answers to what?"
Patron: "You know. To everything."

At this point, my friend stops to supress an uncomfortable chuckle - who the hell is this person? I should note here as well that neither my friend nor I are particularly religious.

Friend: "Well, this is a Science Library, so I don't know if I can help you. Perhaps you might consult a Bible?"
Patron: "Thank you. I knew you could help."

Indeed.