melephant

I dreamt I was watching Conan O'Brien, and Andy Richter had just left, so they were doing this thing where they were auditioning new sidekicks. Kind of a long-running gag over the course of a few weeks. And John Candy was the guest and he said something funny (I forget what) and Jon Cryer, who was the sidekick that day, goes, "thank you folks, I'll...
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I shouldn't have gotten drunk in that voodou cemetery in New Orleans.
I shouldn't have gotten drunk in that voodou cemetery in New Orleans.
I shouldn't have gotten drunk in that voodou cemetery in New Orleans.
I didn't mean no disrespect. Honest. Please let me off the hook.

I can't stop cumming.

Lordy, have I met my match.

The boy has a way with words, believe me.

cook sew draw write nap play listen bathe
Tuesday is the best day.
The kids are here.
I love cartoons and grilled cheese.

I love this weather.

Oh, so you know me so well now, huh? Cuz you read my diary when I was gone. You said, "you would've done the same thing if I left my journal laying on the couch." And yeah. You're right. I've read it. And you're a shitty writer. You've taken too many drugs and it has destroyed your ability to complete a thought. So yeah. I...
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We made the scene last night. I berated a pianist for using the "you bitch, you slut, you whore" theme throughout the night. He said I was too conservative to appreciate his humor. whatever.

Cry. My eyes. Are wet with tears all the time. And I love you for your sympathy, for long hours of love and understanding. Please. Don't. Abandon. Me. Now.

To be awaken at 4 am by my lover's hysterical ex-girlfriend is a terrifying thing. She burst through the door and woke me out of a nightmare, no less. crazy-eyed, screaming accusations, breaking things. Breaking things. Really. She overturned the coffee table on her way out the door. He must be fucking her, right?