mcsc

Hi Emma if you read this, cause you're the only one,

I just don't know if these last six days are going to be this bad... but if they are, help me someone to survive them.

Spending 6 hours last night thinking of the past, and listening to Stabbing Westward is highly explosive for someone like me... for anyone else, the past, might be happy, but if you're like me, you have that one record you always put on when you feel like death is breathing down your neck, well for me that's Stabbing Westward- Darkest Days, it brings me back to my most destructive days... my own darkest days. All of this meant that today I spent around $20 on a movie and drink for one and a half mindless hours to try to make me feel as though I wasn't kissing death's icy lips, but to no avail, as soon as the movie was done, I fell immediately back into my state of comatose... and here I am, 8 o'clock on a Saturday night, in my pjs eating bread.... I don't drink but Id give anything to be drunk right now...