manchester_black

I think last night was the first time I consciously was aware that I had conjured a spirit. Not in the whole candles and incense, ouija board way - although I could see that being a pretty interesting way to kill an afternoon- but more in the sense that I altered my own perceptions through means that are still a bit of a mystery to me. I opened the door and let Tyler Durden call the shots. Now, not Tyler in the lets go blow up buildings and revert to anarchy, but more the principle that he can emobdy. That self-idealization, aspect of the wolf part inside that a lot of people let stay dormant. In some crack in the veneer, I let that avatar take the reins. And it reminded me of things I had lost, of things certain people had drained right out of me, and like some sort of tribal parton spirit it rewarded my faith in it. Hopefully I'll go to sleep more and more, and I'll gladly let myself become my Tyler Durden longer and longer...