maireandhsi

I miss Barton Street kids.
To: "Connor Owens" <cowens>


i awoke this morning with the curtains covering me in bed. like a tent. making me feel as if i was sleeping on the porch as opposed to my bedroom. it was upon fully opening my eyes that i realized there was a massive electrical storm on its way. this would ordinarily mean nothing to most people. aside from those unfortunate enough to have been struck by lightning. and those who have a roof leak that seems to get worse by the minute.
so. out the door. to get tar and fiberglass patches.. all of my waking day spent on the roof patching what turned out to be about eight feet of cracks in the asphalt. getting tar all over my hands and being rained on. now the storm is here. and i'm wondering if my work will have been sufficient. time will tell.
anyway.
to the task at hand. hellraiser could be more than just a movie. i realize that technically since it is on film, it is called film. but it is still just a movie to me. film exists as something different in my mind.
and you're right. if a movie can inspire so much, then it must transcend its physicality. however, it did not insprie those ideas. it was, rather, analyzed using those ideas as a platform. 19th century german philosophers inspired those ideas. well, more accurate to say that reading nietzsche was the first instance of my exposure to the idea of the sublime.
now. nearly everyone who knows so much about nietzsche, but oddly enough has read very few of his works will tell youall about his contributions of nihilism and godlessness. and will stop there. because that is what startled them themost. so it is generally what is most easily retained.
what they neglect to tell you is thehistory leading up to his ideas. which, arguably are the most important bits. this may be long winded.. soforgive me.
the christian traditionis said to have been originated by the dicatates of the god of a small middle eastern tribe.these dictates, nietzsche proposed, were formulated through the transvaluation of the noble morality by jewish slaves. In this transvaluation process, the slave group (who associate the master group with all things evil..ie: theirround healthiness, apathy, complacency, simplicty) revaluate the concept of good byaligningit with the qualities whichoppose the master group. this in essence was a way oflevelling the feild. by replacing wordlyvalues such as pride, prosperity, satisfaction withmodesty and humility.
a radical move. a move both reactionary and evolutionary. it embodies much of what nietzsche believes.. and i couldn't agree more.. is essential to life.
however. over time, most everything will lose its power.i think mostly because it becomes scenery. blues, jazz, rock, punk..whatever are no longer dangerous. they are traditions. god is no longer dangerous. he is a snow capped, english speaking white man who lives in the sky.these things do not inspire awe.

so, neitzsche proposes in one of his essays a practical solution.something that, although worth reading,is a little morethan a bit removed from my point. called Onething is needful.
"To 'give style' to one's character -a great and rare art! It is practiced by those who survey all the strengths and weaknesses of their nature and then fit them into an artistic plan until every one of them appears as art and reason and even weaknesses delight the eye. Here a large massof second nature has been added; there a piece of original nature has been removed - both times through long practice and daily work at it.Here the ugly that could not be removed is concealed; there it has been reinterpreted and made sublime."

a constant survey of your own character leading to modifications through which all ugliness becomes either intentional orrational. or simply beautiful. suffering is allowed. satisfaction is allowed. one creates his or her own meaning based on passionate research and insight.the character and therefore the agent is infinitely more malleable.

but this solution need not only apply to human beings and their character. if the spirit behind jazz or blues or punk had been constantly reinterpreted and had kept moving forward, we might have something remarkable today. not just recordings of instances where people at one time stopped and decided to change the world.

there is a process in electrical engineering called circuit bending.it is essentially experimentationwithin an existing platform. for instance.. if one had a toy that played the tune of mary had a little lamb and he or she bridged a gap in the ciruitry, the result may be the same song only an octave lower. or it could be a song that sounds nothing like what the toy was programmed to play. installing apparatus to confuse or confound or possibly even damage.this isthe equally important side of the same token.theopposition to beauty is essential. it isn't enough to make theugly rational or beautiful. one must also make the beautiful chaotically complex and displeasing. it is the space within the union of these two motivations that i hope to occupy.
and the issues i was disappointed hellraiserneglected to delve further into were those of simultaneity. good and evil are only modes of difference. just as left and right. here and there. this and that. human inventions. they exist to clarify.. because we crave definition.
however, time grinds all grain to flour. on a long enough timeline.. all of these useless particulars are not opposites. they are the same. because all things converge on the other side of the sphere.you understand. travel north for long enough and you will beheaded south.
plus the imagery used in the movie was mediocre and accessible. hooks and chains and tearing flesh black leather blood blah blahb lah. true fright and wonder seem to come from thatwhich is impossible to categorize. blinding light and black holes all at once.is what pinhead would look like but still retaining his human characteristics. radiating intothe other( the victim) ...who blends into pinhead while simultaneously expiring and ejaculating. horror films often fall short of their title.
perhaps not ejaculation but some sort of macro-organic mitosis.
i think that pinhead's ability to be interpreted was a mistake. the people in the films should be feeling something so powerful and subtle that they don't know whether they are in states of agony or ecstacy. they should be sleeping with their eyes open and pouring water. they should be bleeding from every pore and orifice. shitting pissing and cumming. they should be vibrating and humming and reduced to a base organism. the things that people should be most afraid ofcannot someday become a cliche. metal bands can't employ these thingsin their acts. and i'm not even certain they are that which film could capture. but directors should at least try. hellraiser is a better movie than most horror movies. but one cannot confuse being better than shit with being what it needs to be.
so. i think that is where i conclude. because i am tired of staring at the computer and i really should be drawing. making myself for the future, you know.writing like i do. i'd advise against it. but to each his own.
how wasyour time spent with megan? i hope you both had fun.
talk to you soon.