Topic: Back and Bound by Obligation
I have just returned from a trip to Saskatchewan. While the other SG'ers in Calgary have enjoyed a rather nice introduction to spring, I was in windswept Saskatchewan, working in a muggy greenhouse.
I was able to visit with my parents though (they are the owners of said greenhouse). So far, all is well with them. My brother and sister are doing fine. Even my grandmother (my last surviving grandparent) is doing well.
But man, how odd it can be to come home.
I found out from my sister that the family dog, perished a month or so ago, is in the family freezer, waiting for the family burial once the ground thaws. How morbid!
I'm not going to mention the worse stuff. Too much strangeness for one night.
But anyways, I was pressed into service at the family greenhouse. I thought it detracted from the visit, and I felt like my parents were taking advantage of my kindness. I worked hard for them, not because I wanted to, but because I felt obliged to. They did however pay me some money, though I already owe them plenty. This I feel terrible about. How am I supposed to take handouts without wounding a part of my pride? I do not know.
But we had a talk about my future. It's been a year since I graduated, and I have not received a decent job. Though my parents were patient six months ago, right now they are anxious. In fact, both parents suggested I go into the Canadian Armed Forces. No... not suggested. They told me to seriously consider it, which means DO IT!
I told them I would seriously consider it (unlike them, I say exactly what I mean). I have thought about it. A pension if I stick with it for twenty years, or a sizable chunk of my student loan paid off in four. I'll get to travel the world (a desire of mine). It's what a writer needs.
Doesn't mean I want to become the newest soldier in the Canadian Army though. Though I seriously consider it, I really don't want to join. However, it's still a wise decision.
Should I do what's best for me, or what I want? I don't think here is where i'll find the answer, because it is bias towards 'do what you want'. I have to re-evaluate both ends, and come up with a solution that will get my parents off my back and still make me happy.
I better find a real job quick...
[Edited to say: Check out some stuff I wrote while on the bus! It's at the group POETRY KICKS ASS!]
I have just returned from a trip to Saskatchewan. While the other SG'ers in Calgary have enjoyed a rather nice introduction to spring, I was in windswept Saskatchewan, working in a muggy greenhouse.
I was able to visit with my parents though (they are the owners of said greenhouse). So far, all is well with them. My brother and sister are doing fine. Even my grandmother (my last surviving grandparent) is doing well.
But man, how odd it can be to come home.
I found out from my sister that the family dog, perished a month or so ago, is in the family freezer, waiting for the family burial once the ground thaws. How morbid!
I'm not going to mention the worse stuff. Too much strangeness for one night.
But anyways, I was pressed into service at the family greenhouse. I thought it detracted from the visit, and I felt like my parents were taking advantage of my kindness. I worked hard for them, not because I wanted to, but because I felt obliged to. They did however pay me some money, though I already owe them plenty. This I feel terrible about. How am I supposed to take handouts without wounding a part of my pride? I do not know.
But we had a talk about my future. It's been a year since I graduated, and I have not received a decent job. Though my parents were patient six months ago, right now they are anxious. In fact, both parents suggested I go into the Canadian Armed Forces. No... not suggested. They told me to seriously consider it, which means DO IT!
I told them I would seriously consider it (unlike them, I say exactly what I mean). I have thought about it. A pension if I stick with it for twenty years, or a sizable chunk of my student loan paid off in four. I'll get to travel the world (a desire of mine). It's what a writer needs.
Doesn't mean I want to become the newest soldier in the Canadian Army though. Though I seriously consider it, I really don't want to join. However, it's still a wise decision.
Should I do what's best for me, or what I want? I don't think here is where i'll find the answer, because it is bias towards 'do what you want'. I have to re-evaluate both ends, and come up with a solution that will get my parents off my back and still make me happy.
I better find a real job quick...
[Edited to say: Check out some stuff I wrote while on the bus! It's at the group POETRY KICKS ASS!]
Mind you, being an RCMP is better and they're recruiting now.