Friday Nov 05, 2004

0
im so scraed. im fucking terrified of falling in love. and i will not let myself which scares me even more. and i dont think its falling in love im afraid of. its falling in love and then getting hurt, which i have every right to fear, as it has happened several times. and we are not together. but we are not not together either....i dont know whats going on and that scares me too. please hug me. im sick and my tummy hurts and im crying.
su:
youre not alone, I do know what you feel. i have felt that before too.
su:
i wish i could tell you that there was one magical way of overcoming that fear--of falling in love, of letting people get close to you, the risk of getting hurt. i just knew that if I didn't try to let people in I would never overcome the fear. so i just kept pushing myself to let people get close. and at first i got hurt alot, but over time I learned how to read people. I can usually figure out who's nice, and who's bad news. I can these days anyways.
like i said it's no easy solution.

its like with trust. with all trust there's is risk, the risk of that trust being broken. but that doesn't mean you shouldn't trust at all, b/c without it there are no friends. risk is part of it.

don't let your fear, fear you. if you get hurt, thats why you have friends. let your friends in and pick you up, and brush you off, and get you back in the game.

i doubt this really answered your question, but this is stuff I've figured out over time.

kiss

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