kludog

why did i think things could be different? nothing is better, only more of a reminder of what i knew and dreaded in my heart. i fear the day when all my nightmares are realized. which seems to be coming soon. people feel a need to cheer you up only when you are at the lowest point. like some sick game of providing some false hope. people dont know that if they only listened and were a tad bit nicer on a day to day basis, then more people wouldnt be down. it is not cool to care, it is not cool to try to change things for the better. i love this journal it is such great thearpy. it has made me realize how disturbed i sound, but this is not all of me. i am just taking the bad side of me out on this journal as a form of release.