note to Texas about it's damn "Southern Hospitality"...it's fucking 4 AM!!!!! Shut up and stop trying to ask me about the weather and if it's cold where I live and give me my breakfast burrito.
I figured out why everyone I know from Texas is such a Texas fan and can't get over how wonderful Texas is and how it's so beautiful there and Texas is superior to anywhere in the entire world and don't mess with Texas and *gets in your face* Texas is the greatest place in the world..........you mutherfukers never shut up about Texas and yr brainwashed from birth!!!!
Just going to the South is one thing -- it's pretty self-contained and doesn't welcome outsiders -- but Texas is a whole other country.
Exhibit A - the airport.
The Austin airport only plays music by artists from Texas...um, not all of it is good, people.
Exhibit B - the television commercials
Every single commercial -- even on cartoon network -- had to do with the infrastructure of Texas. One had a person dump a bunch of trash on a girl to the quip of, "If your girlfriend were Texas, would you litter on her too?". Slippppeerrrryyyyyy slooooppppeeeee. I digress. It's just that every single commercial insists on saying the word Texas.
Exhibit C - the people
"You should move down to Austin", "Texas is a great place to raise kids", "I don't know why you stay where you are, you'd love it here". Holy Fucking Twilight Zone, people! Shut up! Do you not notice how hot it is even in April? Be happy I'm not there because I would bitch about the heat every fucking day...it gives me a rash.
I would blame it on a Napoleon complex, but yr too big...well, California is pretty big too...maybe a little bigger than Texas...mwahahahahahaha.
You would seriously get your ass kicked for saying that to...at least five people I know.
Austin was nice. Waterloo records is really great because everything is put in one big section in alphabetical order -- no "indie", "industrial", "indigenous", etc. Amy's ice Cream is nice. Walking around 6th street was fun. Every band in the entire world tours there. That guy with a crown on his head that plays bass on the street is really cool.
But
There are still a bunch of rednecks -- trying to pass themselves off as hippies -- that look at you weird if your hair is different. They don't welcome the "Japanese Raver" look -- that's what I was described as last night; if your shoes are a different color they look at you with a look like they give cows right before they're branded.
note...a heifer is a cow that has not yet had a calf, not just a female cow.
Ok, enough of that. I can do this because I hate where I live too. Don't get me wrong, there are great people everywhere...they're just dwarfed by the losers.
I figured out why everyone I know from Texas is such a Texas fan and can't get over how wonderful Texas is and how it's so beautiful there and Texas is superior to anywhere in the entire world and don't mess with Texas and *gets in your face* Texas is the greatest place in the world..........you mutherfukers never shut up about Texas and yr brainwashed from birth!!!!
Just going to the South is one thing -- it's pretty self-contained and doesn't welcome outsiders -- but Texas is a whole other country.
Exhibit A - the airport.
The Austin airport only plays music by artists from Texas...um, not all of it is good, people.
Exhibit B - the television commercials
Every single commercial -- even on cartoon network -- had to do with the infrastructure of Texas. One had a person dump a bunch of trash on a girl to the quip of, "If your girlfriend were Texas, would you litter on her too?". Slippppeerrrryyyyyy slooooppppeeeee. I digress. It's just that every single commercial insists on saying the word Texas.
Exhibit C - the people
"You should move down to Austin", "Texas is a great place to raise kids", "I don't know why you stay where you are, you'd love it here". Holy Fucking Twilight Zone, people! Shut up! Do you not notice how hot it is even in April? Be happy I'm not there because I would bitch about the heat every fucking day...it gives me a rash.
I would blame it on a Napoleon complex, but yr too big...well, California is pretty big too...maybe a little bigger than Texas...mwahahahahahaha.
You would seriously get your ass kicked for saying that to...at least five people I know.
Austin was nice. Waterloo records is really great because everything is put in one big section in alphabetical order -- no "indie", "industrial", "indigenous", etc. Amy's ice Cream is nice. Walking around 6th street was fun. Every band in the entire world tours there. That guy with a crown on his head that plays bass on the street is really cool.
But
There are still a bunch of rednecks -- trying to pass themselves off as hippies -- that look at you weird if your hair is different. They don't welcome the "Japanese Raver" look -- that's what I was described as last night; if your shoes are a different color they look at you with a look like they give cows right before they're branded.
note...a heifer is a cow that has not yet had a calf, not just a female cow.
Ok, enough of that. I can do this because I hate where I live too. Don't get me wrong, there are great people everywhere...they're just dwarfed by the losers.
VIEW 20 of 20 COMMENTS
Yea, I am really digging Schneider TM, but I must say I have been listening to a lot of Genesis "Abacaba", Funkadelic, Yo La Tengo, and The Sea and Cake recently. Man, there is just so much good stuff out there. We need to have very lengthy music talks. I could talk to you for weeks and still want more. Ha ha. Take it easy Dave.