justme159

life can be so damn difficult sometimes. and other people in your life really don't make it any easier. take me for example...

i've got a new guy, whom i am crazy about. yes, there is the distance thing, but to me its not a huge factor. it sucks, but its the way it is right now. so, i tell my family...they start giving me the 3rd degree...i understand--they are my parents, they are concerned. i probably would be too. they tell me that because i'm pregnant that they don't understand how anyone would want me. i'm pregnant...i don't have some weird disease they don't understand me, which is fine, they never really have...i'm used to it. and his family isn't making it easy for him. basically doing the same thing...thinking the distance thing is crazy.

and its creating stress for both of us. he's stressed about what to do. i'm stressed because i can't help. i feel so helpless. all i want to do it fix it, but all i can do is wait. i can email him job openings here, i can talk to people who may know places that are hiring, but in the end, it is completely out of my hands. its up to him to apply for the jobs and to make the actual steps to come up here. i can only do so much.

and there's this feeling of urgency involved...not for me, but for him. he's being pushed and pulled to make a decision NOW. and i don't know what to do to help...don't know what to say to make it better.

so, all i can do is sit here and feel useless and helpless and just hope that he doesn't give up i don't think he will, but i don't know that for sure.