janegeraldine

I brought up something pretty unpleasant from my past last night that I maybe should not have because today it's kind of weighing on my mind a little heavier than I would like it too. It isn't something I dwell on, but something that kind of gets in and makes itself comfortable once in awhile if I don't keep an eye on the door. I'll live through it this time just as I always have, but that doesn't make it any more pleasant. The thing with things like is that they kind of never really get "better"... I have just learned to put them in places that they can't hurt me from. No matter how tightly I think I'm locking it up, it can still find a way out. I let my guard down for a minute and there it was. My bad. I hate that the memory never gets LESS vivid and horrifying, but always stays the same as when it happened. I just have to realize that because it happened in the past doesn't mean it will happen again and there are people around me who are more than willing to help me feel better and who want me to be safe. I'm sure none of this makes a whole lot of sense, but I have my reasons for not being more specific. Anyway, as always, I appreciate anyone reading this.