I have been away. Not in a physical sense, but spiritually I've been feeling pretty detatched for a while. Times of high stress always do this to me, I get so depersonalised and gain a truly flattened affect. People tell me it's like I'm not really there.
I threw a proper wobbly on Sunday, smashed up one of the signs outside work in a kind of impotent, cathartic rage. It didn't gain me much, just a vague feeling of embarrassment.
I'm feeling much more myself now, though. I have two weeks of holiday starting friday, I'm going to Cornwall on the Friday night sleeper train, then Devon on Saturday, Mooch around the south west on Sunday, Then I might be going to Cardiff the weekend after that, but that's not been confirmed yet. I need more stuff to do, otherwise I will spend the entire fortnight in my room; smoking weed and procrastinating.
I just got a letter calling me in for an "individual consultation" regarding the company-wide redundancies that are imminent. It's on a day when I'm supposed to be on holiday, so I don't know if I'm going to go or not. They are cunts, and I really don't give a shit any more. Fuck them.
I threw a proper wobbly on Sunday, smashed up one of the signs outside work in a kind of impotent, cathartic rage. It didn't gain me much, just a vague feeling of embarrassment.
I'm feeling much more myself now, though. I have two weeks of holiday starting friday, I'm going to Cornwall on the Friday night sleeper train, then Devon on Saturday, Mooch around the south west on Sunday, Then I might be going to Cardiff the weekend after that, but that's not been confirmed yet. I need more stuff to do, otherwise I will spend the entire fortnight in my room; smoking weed and procrastinating.
I just got a letter calling me in for an "individual consultation" regarding the company-wide redundancies that are imminent. It's on a day when I'm supposed to be on holiday, so I don't know if I'm going to go or not. They are cunts, and I really don't give a shit any more. Fuck them.
VIEW 12 of 12 COMMENTS
cureelise:
nice - just got done chatting with my james in amersham- he texted me around 9 this morning to get me up and online - he's one of the only people that I will wake up early for - we met thanks to SG - he just ran out to get some green . hehehehe - we are trying to figure out who smoke more - me or him-
cureelise:
just got through some stuff that we just harvested - and we usually go through a quarter within a week or an eighth