jackinblack

i want to tell you a story of 2006
this life
within a sombre week has been compartmentalised
succinctly then
i have betrayed the trust, faith and respect
of the only person whom i have held closest
and loved unconditionally for almost
10 tears
i have no excuses for this betrayal
iam not judas
iam not brutas
iam not even jesus
yet iam not a devil
attempting instead tp prevent malignant forces
i have unleashed
i dont understand the forces
nor see them

but they are inside me now
mustering up snarling hyena packs of stamina
to brutalise open the space in my head
reserved for her
it is the most tender spot i can
cultivate
it is like a child in its care and
innocence
it is warm and soft
life sprouts from here
shrubs and bird would abound
if allowd in
fish would flicker here
if it were a garden undersea

i dont want to drown this love
i dont want to see love's lips turn blue
i do not know how to revive the drowned
i cannot help my own personal lazarus
all i can think of is a saviour
i only want to shout at my
tender place for love
WAKE UP ! WAKE UP !
pain is coming
outside is getting in
WAKE UP ! WAKE UP !

i have tolstey's ice pick
i have the machine guns and shovels of the einsertzcommando
they are lined up waiting to maim me
on my orders
on the outside
in a part of my head
a mob is braying for my love
on a pike !
paraded and spat on
strung up and humilated even in death
like mussolini, a failure too
the ice pick is sticking out ofmy head
fluids are gushing out
my hands are fretting at the wound
as ineffective as twigs
iam trying to hold everything inside in
prolong the life of this love
iam losing sensation
iam becoming an automation

i know all over that i need help to practise
this great rescue
but noone can see me
iam an island of myself
i sit alone at a wooden hole for a window
cloudless sky
one star
sounds of traffic dirging
aeroplanes, voices drift over
lost untranslatable
shouts screams
laughter
humanity nameless, faceless
cold
i catch myself drifting upwards
towards the solitary star
bitter ice must reside upon its surface
it sparkles and shines too hard
on it pathetically
iam trying to wish away my misfortunes
ill luck
deceit
lies
errors
misjudgement
they are here to curse my very pure
form
WAKE UP !!!

and than
thinkin wry
listen to chicks on speed
this song made me grin
kaltes, klares wasser
kaltes - klares
kaltes - klares
kaltes - klares
kaltes -
kaltes, klares wasser
kaltes - kaltes
kaltes - hmmm
kaltes/wasser
kaltes/wasser
kaltes/wasser
kaltes, klares wasser
kaltes
kalt und klar
kaltes, klares wasser
kaltes - kaltes
ber meine krper

dig my fingernails
into the armpit of america
let down your hair
hang on for the ride
concorde take-off
plastered to the back of my seat
pink finger nail polish
on your right breast
eating your pussy
and all around us
saturated
in
kaltes, klares wasser

all over ninetynine tilt
intentions
strong legs standing on my board
golden shower all over my face
big water
at least a little
my water
entrails pussy floor

silicon, silicon
silicon suction
the unwanted curves
exposed by
kaltes, klares wasser

kaltes/ber meine krper/kaltes
kaltes - kaltes/hmmm
klares/kaltes - kaltes - klares/klares
kaltes, klares wasser

arrested and released
my body
bleeding all over your best rod
by the fire
my body is burning
and you pour
kaltes, klares wasser
all over me

chill me out
call me down
no feeling no control
my body is a weapon
waiting at your door
hold me under
don't let go

kaltes, klares wasser