So, this weeks blog topic is 'Our Best Advice'. Now, I know I am not old. However, being on a site populated mostly by people in their twenties does make a gal feel her years more often than not. But, the best part of being older is indeed being wiser. I wish I had a time machine so that I could go back to my young self and say things like, "That cocaine sounds like an AWESOME idea. But trust me, it's not", "Don't make a marriage out of a one night stand, especially since he likes Jimmy Buffet", "Do you REALLY need that last drink?", and finally, "Pay your damn bills on time!".
Before I go off on some unrelated tangent (which has been known to happen from time to time) I am going to say this: be yourself and listen to your heart. I know that sounds so utterly contrived and hackneyed. I know that such words are written in greeting card. You're probably saying to yourselves, "Damn, Iggy. I KNOW that you can come up with something better than that!" But honestly, I can't. Because everything I would have to say to you would lead back to being yourself and listening to your intuition. I feel that if I had done those two things I would have avoided so much heartache and trouble. That doesn't mean that I feel regret, but sometimes I look back on the pain I caused other people because of my poor decisions and I feel guilty.
So there you have it: Be yourself and listen to your heart. Your heart will rarely steer you wrong.
Oh, and if you go back in time never try to invade Russia in winter or play the Devils Tritone.
Onto other news, I can already tell that this summer is going to be a doozie. It's already getting hot. Last year, we lucked out with a long spring that seemed to extend all the way into June. It was amazing. But this year I have a feeling that summer will come early and leave us all in the sweltering heat. I don't mind heat, but you can only take so much off before it's considered public indecency and before you know it you're registering on the sex offender registry list because you just had to take your pants off within a hundred yards of an elementary school because the swamp ass you were experiencing was becoming unbearable.
I had a pretty rockin' weekend, though I must say that the neighborhood was weird this weekend, populated by people that looked like they'd be better off at a country club or at a restaurant uptown. I wondered what this sudden plague of locusts was. Then, I was told that the Wells Fargo Gold Tournament took place here in Charlotte this weekend. *shudder* That explained all the yuppies that had suddenly descended on our neighborhood like vultures. You see, our neighborhood has been getting a bit more gentrified. Sure, that means there's cool shit to do, but it also means the rents are going to go up and that it will soon be populated by nothing but cornhole playing asswipes who feel the need to fight over what sports team is better. Our little artists enclave is gone, and I didn't even get to experience the best part of it. I came to the party late as usual. I feel as if I am in the denouement of the story of Plaza Midwood.
Also, I'm hung the fuck over. Seriously. Last night, I could have used a visit from myself in the future telling me that that last beer was not a good idea.
I got myself some new undies and a new bra. And socks. But not the exciting kind of socks.
You can't see them well, but I got myself those Pac Man undies I'd been eyeing lately. Because of my bipolar, I have to seriously watch my shopping and spending habits. When I'm manic, I can go on a spree that would rival that of a Rockefeller. So, to avoid spending my money like a drunken sailor on shore leave I tend to think about things a while before I purchase them, even little things like underpants and new computer speakers (which I also acquired).
Anyway, I hope you all had a fantastic weekend and stayed out of trouble or at least made bail if you did manage to get into trouble.
