iamthelaw

OVERHEARD IN HARLEM

In a significant personal and physical upheaval, I recently relocated from Long Island City, Queens to a sublet in East Harlem. (Not the gentrified part).

I'm getting to love the neighborhood, although it's probably temporary. I plan to settle with a law school friend among Brooklyn's self-satisfied hipsters in the next few months.

But in the interim, I am digging the street life. Walking from 120th Street to the 125th Street 4,5,6 stop is some of the best entertainment around.

Below are a few gems I have culled from people talking on their cells or with companions on my pedestrian commute over the past weeks. You can't make this shit up:

"I'm not gonna use no prosthetics. I told him I'm not gonna use no dildo."

"You don't get the honey unless you got the money."

"I need to find a buffet or some shit."

My favorite was a group of kids who were about 12-years-old who pointed at me and said: "Awwww, man. We got rednecks living here now!"

The disappointment registered on their face. One look at me said it all to them: There goes the neighborhood.