frustration, endless frustration
fighting an owi,
keep getting shitty crew in my section at work
all i do is sit at home all day until i get a ride to work
9 hours of freezer time later i come home, so far i've been lucky and been able to get a ride every night, but i figure a long hike is in my future at some point
sometimes it all just kinda boils down to rage
some minor thing pushes me too far and i just want to smash everything
break something to fix myself
but i don't
i go back to doing whatever menial task i was doing before
throw boxes
now throw boxes faster
go help some other section throw more boxes
go home
be alone
if i'm lucky talk to some girl 1800 miles away who gives me delusions it won't always be like this
but all i ever get of what i want is a taste
a month with a new car
a couple weeks or days with a cute girl
some minor success
then crash
dump
fail
bent not broken
if i'd just break i'd have to fix something
instead of limping on
fighting an owi,
keep getting shitty crew in my section at work
all i do is sit at home all day until i get a ride to work
9 hours of freezer time later i come home, so far i've been lucky and been able to get a ride every night, but i figure a long hike is in my future at some point
sometimes it all just kinda boils down to rage
some minor thing pushes me too far and i just want to smash everything
break something to fix myself
but i don't
i go back to doing whatever menial task i was doing before
throw boxes
now throw boxes faster
go help some other section throw more boxes
go home
be alone
if i'm lucky talk to some girl 1800 miles away who gives me delusions it won't always be like this
but all i ever get of what i want is a taste
a month with a new car
a couple weeks or days with a cute girl
some minor success
then crash
dump
fail
bent not broken
if i'd just break i'd have to fix something
instead of limping on