She asked me tonight for space. I have to respect that. It hurts, but it’s something that I can’t negotiate. I hope that she’s not leading me on. We still have a trip planned together. I hope that in taking a step back, when can take more steps forward. If not I guess I’ll be my usual single self. Only time will tell.
My anxiety has spoken to me in ways that my own enemies haven’t. It tried to convince me that my girlfriend didn’t want me to come into town. It tried to convince me to stay in Phoenix and not Fly to NYC. It tried to convince me that all of its lies were true and thankfully my support system and friends convinced me to tell...
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I’ve seen such beauty in this world. Such peace. I’ve seen both oceans here in America and dug my feet in the sands. I’ve seen museums and paintings that evoke such passionate joy that I’d sit and stare for hours. I’ve seen acts of kindness that could be only believed if seen with your own eyes. I’ve seen such love that it would break a...
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When do you draw a line in the sand and say enough is enough? When do you just admit you’re too much for anyone else? Or that you’re not enough? That you don’t have the tools to be in a happy healthy relationship? When do you just admit you’re better off alone? When do you admit that your inner monologue is right and has been...
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I’ve struggled my whole life with being pessimistic but never really thought that the late nights and almost paralyzing fear were something that affected my daily life. It was separate. But now it’s making me stay up late, not eat, have anxiety caused by fear of abandonment and an sense that everything is just temporary so why keep people around. I’m getting help tomorrow. I’m...
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Life is a cycle of repeated failures until you figure out how to make it work for you. I have no idea how to stop my cycle. And I’m tired of trying. Tired of being alone. Tired of putting in work and getting nothing. Tired of being used. Tired of missing home. Tired of going places and feeling alone, even in a room full of...
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Was a progressive year this year. I switched jobs. Made more money this year than I have ever. Almost financially stable now. Got a car. Went to San Diego. Came home for the holidays. Became the main tenant on my lease. Kicked out shitbags. Got promoted at work. Etc...
Downsides: gained weight and only got tattooed 3 times.
In other news: still single.😂
I started my new job this week. It's going well so far. My only issue is getting up like 3-4 hrs earlier than normal. I was on my old schedule for years. So waking up at 6:30 is killing me. But I really think this job is gonna work out. It's nerve racking to change jobs after you've been somewhere for so long. But it...
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I've been Arizona for five years and some change. It's been a trip. Lots of ups and downs. Lots of changes both personally and around me. Now I'm about to make a huge change professionally. I'm leave my current job that I've been at 4.5 years for a new start. It's a good bump in pay with way less stress. I'm pretty stoked. It's time...
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I find myself going through phases in life. I've come back to this site countless times. I'll stop paying and go away and then come back to it. Age 22 I finally decide to become a member and it becomes one of the best things I ever become apart of. Now at age 35 it's nostalgic. Well I'm back. Let's see what happens.