Saturday May 27, 2006

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Oh holy hell. I decided to update a few things in my "Dating Profile" when I came across "My Dating Status". eeek It said "Cheater". frown I can't believe I made this mistake when I set up the profile. Not only am I "Single", but I'm also such an ass...


Now, for the record:
"I am not a cheater, nor have I ever been a cheater, nor will I ever be a cheater."

I've been cheated on before and I know how much it sucks. I'd never want to hurt anyone the way I was.

Cheaters never prosper, they get VD & pay alimony :p

In fact you kind of have to be in a relationship before you can even cheat. So how can I be cheating!?! Well, I suppose you could say "you're 'cheating' your way out of life man, you need to find someone nice and settledown" Or you could say "hey, you just need to get laid". Trust me, I've heard it all before and I'm sure to hear it again...

Whatever, I feel like a born again virgin with nothing to lose because I've already made myself the biggest loser. Pretty soon I'll just be like a jealous and grumpy old man shaking my fist at the world.

Hmmna-mumna-mumble-grumble... Fornicaters! *shaking fist* Damn, dirty over-sexed kids. Back in my day, we 'd only have sex but once a year and we hated it. We didn't have any fancy toys or lotions or lingerie. We just revved up the old chain-saw and had at it... When you were done, you'd just light up a doobie and sit there. Mumble-grumble-mumble... Why, it's people like you who're messin' up the world with yer, whips and chains, velvet and vinyl, and what is this rubbish I hear about gettin' yer bodies all pimped out like a tournament of roses parade float? Tattoos and nipple piercings, high heels and garter belts, bah! Fooey on yers...

God, please don't let me become that way (deliver me from evil and send me an angel of mercy).

Satan, please don't let me become that way (deliver me unto the clutches of the naughty imp of sin).

Might as well hedge my bets. Can't hurt, can it???
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
piratepete:
Don't complain to me about your bad acne, its not my genes they're yours! biggrin Talk to Dobie about it. I showed DOBERMANN the photo of the screw head halloween photo and made some silly coment about something. He had his profile pic set up kind of night of the living dead.
piratepete:
Well now I'm elligable for the physician assistant program, but there's a ton of other options that opened for me as well. I would really like to become an independant duty corpsman, but that would take me away from family way too often and for way to long, that and the officers get paid real money instead of just chump change. The good thing about making it is that it will mean a pretty good increase in my salary, then after December I'll get an increase in allowances due to the sudden growth of my family wink and when I hit my 6 year mark in April I'll get another raise for being in for more then 6 years. So even if I decided to stay enlisted it would be a pretty good deal, and now that I'm a second class my reenlistment bonus just jumped up into the neighborhood of a really good down payment on a house. biggrin Say warhammer sized eeek

[Edited on Jun 01, 2006 1:33AM]

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