eventide

workshop is almost over. one more session. a month is much too long - i don't know what i was thinking. or what they were thinking. in a sense it depends - on how independent they are. how much they can embrace the ethic of solo artist. the credo. the paradigm. with me , or without me. as if zen alone could provide that.
(which it can. and if an an artist makes movements, then those movements are art.)

i watched charly atlass film today about merce. oh memories. oh nastalgia. oh my former life, AND TO HAVE HAD ONE AT ALL.

oh boy. i have to write merce before hes gone. does billy still train there. i would, if i were in new york. sure.

so i was thinking about that summer in black mountain. how did john find that!? that summer, when all these idea moved, all things art, and the world began anew. and im suddenly wondering who slept with whom then? who felt as deeply as an artist can feel! who thought it through. felt the changes, the ideas! the faith! how we danced then. there were things- there were movements i mean, god ho w how we moved. and john was there, and music. and art. bob rauschenberg was there too. carolyn brown. and merce , the choreographer. he believed. he still does. he gave me some of that. thanks merce. im glad i left new york - but that was a time. billy. and all the rest of them.,., o h man. what have i b ecome?