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endequalsbegin

Philadelphia

Member Since 2008

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Tuesday Dec 01, 2009

Dec 1, 2009
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I've been listening to a lot of people talk about how much they want to just forget their past. This is something I have never understood. But then, I've always had trouble understanding why people think differently than myself.

Forgetting your past is not only almost impossible, but also very detrimental. Your past might not be who you are today, but it is what helped make you into the person that you have become.

There are times when I take a moment to look over my history, to examine where I have been and how far I have come. Some days, it looks like a shattered windshield, held together only by the original tension, threatening to break through and cut me to pieces at any moment. Each crack, each little web of pain threading out from the center is something that has happened to me, something that hurts. Altogether, those unstable cracks equal a feeling of ultimate failure. Those are the days when I feel like I can't get up in the morning.

Those are also the days when I am so thankful for all that I have been through. I might feel like I can't get up out of bed and go about my business, but almost every time, I do anyway. And that is when I realize just how strong of a person I have grown into. I could never have become this person without all that pain.

The pain of the your past is necessary. The pain of today is necessary too. We all have to find a way to learn from the past, not just ignore it, and from those lessons, find a new way to ride out the present. That way, when those little incalculable moments of joy and pleasure sneak up, we're there to smile at their presence.



I'm smiling.

smile

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