This evening I watched The Secret Life of Walter Mitty. Great Movie. When It was over I thought to myself how stale my life has become and how things needed to change now. It is funny how the right movie at the right time can really affected a person. I have this buzz in my gut. A need. I need freedom.
The past few months have not been great for me. In December I was set to marry the wrong woman here in a place I do not enjoy living. Barely getting by on little pay at a job that is less then challenging. I thought I was doing the right thing for her, my family, society but it wasn't the right thing for me. I was putting down what defines me to settle down and have a partner. It wasn't settling down it was just settling. Unfortunately at the time everyone else saw it but me. I don't know why I was on that path. I can't remember when I got lost. Why I had given up on my music, my freedom and my need to find true love. Luckily I was set free just in time to avoid what would have undoubtedly been a failure of a marriage and I was hurt just enough to set a fire in my soul.
Now I stand at yet another crossroad in my life. I no longer want to be half alive. I no longer choose to linger in a mundane, draining, and unsatisfying life. Day dreaming of what I want, or could, or should! I choose to live. This year will be a year of change. I will not let the things of life that move me pass me by any longer. I will not stand in one place for to long. I will go out and get what I want. Go and find the love of my life, that one I have always search crowds for. I will use my talents and renewed confidence to draw the positive to me. I will move from this basement in this shitty town and I will find the life I deserve. Smile and say yes to new signs I see in my road to happiness. I choose to live..