I feel abandoned. Like a hospital that's been condemned with empty hallways and gutted rooms that once had so much worth and use. I am not sure why I feel like this today but I surely do and it;s got me all fucked up. I hope eveyone else out there is having a good day and has spring fever. I am going to drive around...
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sky:
thankyou for sending me the internet hugs! x
sky:
thankyou fo the nice comment about my new tattoo! x
Languish
Well I know who you're with tonight
And I pray that he's only a friend
Cause I'm left in the dark and I....
I can't see the light at the end
Oh you know how I feel
Yes I know that it's real
I'm left writhing in anguish
I don't know what you think
And I'm starting to sink
Will I ever escape this...
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Well I know who you're with tonight
And I pray that he's only a friend
Cause I'm left in the dark and I....
I can't see the light at the end
Oh you know how I feel
Yes I know that it's real
I'm left writhing in anguish
I don't know what you think
And I'm starting to sink
Will I ever escape this...
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VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
sky:
thanks for the friend request! xxx
sky:
hahahahaha ^ how many times did i post that 
I hadn't even noticed
I hadn't even noticed
Well things are going pretty good. I think I am getting over the selfish feeling of loss and anger over my nephew. He will be sorely missed and forever loved. I have a few prospects of romance out there HEHE. That's cool. Jessica is one,although I have no idea how she really feels, then there is Melanie. WOOHOO she is my karaoke drinking buddy and...
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anticlimatic200:
Karaoke drinking buddy? I wish I had a karaoke drinking buddy. She's definately a keeper 
You have a good weekend too, darling
You have a good weekend too, darling
sky:
thankyou for the kind words in my previous journal
Feelings of loss and anger are natural, rather than selfish. I don't know the situation, but you shouldn't feel selfish for having those kinds of feelings.
Take care
Feelings of loss and anger are natural, rather than selfish. I don't know the situation, but you shouldn't feel selfish for having those kinds of feelings.
Take care
Don't Deprive Me
No I would never deprive you anything
not the friends that you love
or your very own time
nor the kisses i'd give
to surely keep you mine
you are more than an angel
of a time greater than forever
i feel ageless but not old
and must strive for this time together
wouldn't have it last anything less than forever
not...
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No I would never deprive you anything
not the friends that you love
or your very own time
nor the kisses i'd give
to surely keep you mine
you are more than an angel
of a time greater than forever
i feel ageless but not old
and must strive for this time together
wouldn't have it last anything less than forever
not...
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cain:
Dig the new tattoo! Inside of the arm...was it tender? I've been considering tattoos in that area, how bad is it? I've got one going on my ribs soon...eeeeeeek! I can only imagine. I'm sorry about your heartache with Sara. Keep ya chin up, bubs.
lost_to_me:
hey bro. u're writing is awsome. thanks for the happy bday wishes. i hope that she can see you as at least a friend, in your stead.
I have no idea what's going on. I feel lost. Like I'm living in limbo. I fucking hurt EVERY night. I want it to end and yet I don't want it to end. I haven't a clue what to do or where to turn. I can't turn to the person I love. She has someone else. And unlike me, he has the privilege of kissing...
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awryx:
aw i think you have to move on.
as i did with someone i liked.
sigh...
miss ya too and thanks.
i hope the days look up for you
as i did with someone i liked.
sigh...
miss ya too and thanks.
i hope the days look up for you
Today is wonderful. I spent all of yesterday with Sara. From like 9am till about 9:30 pm. It was Awesome!!! She got her cute little belly button pierced and I got my tragus redone. I finally got her some vanilla malt waffles. We ate breakfast together spent the whole day tooling around and laughing and smiling and just enjoying it. Then we ate dinner together...
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awryx:
time and patience is good.
something i need to learn
take care and thank u for ur kind comment!
good weekend to ya
oh and i got the car, it's beautiful
[Edited on Sep 16, 2005 8:10PM]
something i need to learn
take care and thank u for ur kind comment!
good weekend to ya
oh and i got the car, it's beautiful
[Edited on Sep 16, 2005 8:10PM]
curiosity:
Wow...that's a horrible story...
I killed a spider the day before and felt HORRIBLE about it, too. The thing saw I was going to squash it and it started to RUN. And I squashed it anyway. The next bug I see, unless it has feelers and a million legs, I'm leaving alone.
Curi.
I killed a spider the day before and felt HORRIBLE about it, too. The thing saw I was going to squash it and it started to RUN. And I squashed it anyway. The next bug I see, unless it has feelers and a million legs, I'm leaving alone.
Curi.
Things are alright. Things Will be alright. Sara is stressing out a little, but it is to be expected. All there is is time and plenty of it. I will stop freakin out. As long as she is alright. She was SOOOOOO much better today. I talked to her on the phone during my entire lunch hour at work and made her laugh a lot...
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Oh my god! Sara and I were talking tonight. I was feeling like an ass cause I haven't been to see Jessica's little brother since she killed herself. He called and it was kinda ugly. Then when I talked to Sara later I was gonna meet her for a little bit. Then she started freaking out. She was crying and she wouldn't say a word...
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curiosity:
You're obsessing a little bit, methinks.
Maybe you should just chill out and turn off your brain for awhile.
Curi.
Maybe you should just chill out and turn off your brain for awhile.
Curi.
OK, so here it is so far. I LOVE Sara with everything that I am. She loves me too. Albeit, in her own way.. Everything about her is wonderful. Even how completely messed up I am over her. Ther other morning at about 4:30 she called me and we talked a bit. She is spending the entire weekend with two other guys that are hot...
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darkangelazrael:
Ron, you are a real man. Of course she should pick you. Why shouldn't she. You can love so very strongly with compassion, uderstanding and sincerity. All the while without being weak. You are my best friend and I love you so much. At one point after we had first met I was madly in love with you. I never voiced it though. And now we are best friends. You have voiced it. She will come around. How couldn't even the thickest of people not come around to a beautiful human being like you? It's impossible. And if she doesn't come around. Or if she denies herself what you are, then perhaps she doesn't deserve it. Your BFF, Jules.
lol. ok that was Jules using my own computer to write me a comment. Since she won't spring for the awfully low price of joining SG. I love her. She is a good friend. Take care everyone!!!
lol. ok that was Jules using my own computer to write me a comment. Since she won't spring for the awfully low price of joining SG. I love her. She is a good friend. Take care everyone!!!
curiosity:
Goddamn. You're lucky just to be able to brood over that kind of shit. Right now I feel nothing for no one but myself.
Curi.
Curi.
Just chillin on a friday night. My nephew is in town. Came in on the train earlier so i took him to my work to meet Sara and to get him a couple of books. And get another copy of my buddies band AIDEN!!!!! Check them out they rock. So anyhow, Things with Sara are cool. Whenever I am at work and she is there...
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awryx:
lol song sounds awesome.
and ur raddd, thank u for ur kind words!
i really appreciate it
have a great weekend
and ur raddd, thank u for ur kind words!
i really appreciate it
have a great weekend
Ok, Sara and I talked last night. She said some things that made me feel pretty good. We were both drunk though. I had to call into work because I totally woke up drunk still. Anyhow, I totally love Sara and she knows it. We are pretty good friends right now and I feel as though becoming a little more than friends might be right...
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suzy_kabloozy:
It is a lot better if you can be friends and lovers. I prefer that route, too, although if it doesn't work out, it does suck to lose a friend. But I wish you the very best of luck with that.
Well, I am in anguish and bliss at all times. Sara is as wonderful as ever. I just wish there was a way for me to show her, to make her understand the constant burning need and fear that is with me always. I love her like I have never loved anyone before. It's as if I promised her in a past life that i...
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cain:
Thanks Ron.
So...does this sara know you love her undyingly, so much that it might destroy you? Or no? You sound like my old boyfriend, he thinks he will die without me. I think he will be okay in time, but we're still not exactly apart. We talk and...other stuff. But I dunno..its kinda a fucked up situation. I just live life how the fuck I want and do what the fuck I want and tell it like it is, or try to. You have a good week, too.
So...does this sara know you love her undyingly, so much that it might destroy you? Or no? You sound like my old boyfriend, he thinks he will die without me. I think he will be okay in time, but we're still not exactly apart. We talk and...other stuff. But I dunno..its kinda a fucked up situation. I just live life how the fuck I want and do what the fuck I want and tell it like it is, or try to. You have a good week, too.
bracket:
thanks hunny. u're such a rare person in this sea of fools.
i mean it.
xoxo
i mean it.
xoxo