Okay Here I am after a long time away...it is 8:55am and I am at work trying to write this before anyone else comes into the office...I bet I will hear from no one seeing as I have been away for such a long time.
Awful AWful things happened for so long...and they continue.
First the Mentholgrrl fight.
Thank god that is over...but amusing what she leaves out...Dinner was lovley last night, I will be fat forever! ANd wish she could ahve watched the cannibalism movie...Ravenous....cause I love it.Too much for her pretty little tummy.
Then I get laid off at the bar where I work weekends...they are low on cash. I have worked there for almost three years and my social life has revoloved around there, and poof! gone...not to mention a large handful of change...my "party" money.
Of course they tell me BEFORE my Friday night shift and leave me with all this booze and all my customers sad and sympathetic and buying shots...they are basically my great friends...I have seen them every weekend since I moved to Georgia!
Needless to say I blacked out halfway through my shift. I managed somehow to count my money and slip out the door, but I also manages tocry and scream and whatnot...Of course I am told all of this second hand...I sure wasn't there. I come in the next day for my final shift...everyone was going to throw me a good-bye party...and the boss,this little shit with muttonchops who thinks he is the shit tells me I am not allowed to work due to my behavior. I hand him the keys and leave.
The irony is that I have seen his ass, and the tatooed monkey flying out of it at least once a month when he is shitfaced , I have seen him drive a motorbike through a stack of flaming PBR cans, crash and land in the garbage can.... and The other boss I have seen fall down the stairs drunk...
It really pisses me off, that when I get drunk for a good reason...and still manage to do my job, I get fuck diddly fucked.
Even funnier, I wanted to quit for the longest time, but getting laid off isn't the same. *sigh*
then two days later my boyfriend gets laid off.
So now we go from making quite a bit of money, to just my design salary.
I ask to work five days at the publishing firm and they are like...well we were just going to give you a raise, but I don't know when, so I say I will work Fridays till you decide...
I call in all my debts from freelance jobs...I hate making clients pay, but what the fuck I gotta make money....now!
And sadly, my birthday is Sunday and my boyfriend had made reservations to have High Tea at the Ritz Carlton. I was very excited. We cancelled the reservation.
mentholgrrls birthday, my birthday and her boy's is all this week and all of us are too scared to spend any money. WE were going to get a cabin in the mountains and instead we will probably drink schlitz and play mah johng. Not that that is not fun...but we wanted to do something cool.
why are we good and then get beat down.
Beat Down
Beat Down
Beat Down
I want to scream I am so frustrated
I want to kill and punch and cry hysterically I am so sick of trying so sick of getting slapped for being good why bother why bother I feel like I will get now where ever!
How come when I do drugs and fuck everything in sight and have no purpose but to admire the trains at 3am coming into New Orleans that everything goes hunky dory I have tons of money and friends and drugs...oh you better believe it!
But of course, I wasn't "really" happy.
As happy as smack can make a person.
Now I lov emy job, I lov emy boyfriend, I love my friends. I love that I like them and can have fun without being high....it's an amazing thing when you don't have to get drunk or stoned or coked up to have a great time with your friends. It's just...I want to go to see a dentist. I want to get a second car (course I should probalby get my license first) I want to go to London with my firned Lori and her husband. I want to go to Vidal sassoon and not feel guilty. I want to paint my kitchen and not think about the fucking price of fucking paint!
I hate money its so dirty and ugle and american, but we need it to go.
I hate it's hold on me, how it can change everything, how I can save and save and be good and the minute I decide to do something for ME I get fucked enormously....
I bend to pick up the shiny quarter, and get a 15 unch cock in my ass.
Fuck!
And now off to some lovely layout of a fucking ugly book we are publishing....god it frustrates me it is sooooo ugly.
Awful AWful things happened for so long...and they continue.
First the Mentholgrrl fight.
Thank god that is over...but amusing what she leaves out...Dinner was lovley last night, I will be fat forever! ANd wish she could ahve watched the cannibalism movie...Ravenous....cause I love it.Too much for her pretty little tummy.
Then I get laid off at the bar where I work weekends...they are low on cash. I have worked there for almost three years and my social life has revoloved around there, and poof! gone...not to mention a large handful of change...my "party" money.
Of course they tell me BEFORE my Friday night shift and leave me with all this booze and all my customers sad and sympathetic and buying shots...they are basically my great friends...I have seen them every weekend since I moved to Georgia!
Needless to say I blacked out halfway through my shift. I managed somehow to count my money and slip out the door, but I also manages tocry and scream and whatnot...Of course I am told all of this second hand...I sure wasn't there. I come in the next day for my final shift...everyone was going to throw me a good-bye party...and the boss,this little shit with muttonchops who thinks he is the shit tells me I am not allowed to work due to my behavior. I hand him the keys and leave.
The irony is that I have seen his ass, and the tatooed monkey flying out of it at least once a month when he is shitfaced , I have seen him drive a motorbike through a stack of flaming PBR cans, crash and land in the garbage can.... and The other boss I have seen fall down the stairs drunk...
It really pisses me off, that when I get drunk for a good reason...and still manage to do my job, I get fuck diddly fucked.
Even funnier, I wanted to quit for the longest time, but getting laid off isn't the same. *sigh*
then two days later my boyfriend gets laid off.
So now we go from making quite a bit of money, to just my design salary.
I ask to work five days at the publishing firm and they are like...well we were just going to give you a raise, but I don't know when, so I say I will work Fridays till you decide...
I call in all my debts from freelance jobs...I hate making clients pay, but what the fuck I gotta make money....now!
And sadly, my birthday is Sunday and my boyfriend had made reservations to have High Tea at the Ritz Carlton. I was very excited. We cancelled the reservation.
mentholgrrls birthday, my birthday and her boy's is all this week and all of us are too scared to spend any money. WE were going to get a cabin in the mountains and instead we will probably drink schlitz and play mah johng. Not that that is not fun...but we wanted to do something cool.
why are we good and then get beat down.
Beat Down
Beat Down
Beat Down
I want to scream I am so frustrated
I want to kill and punch and cry hysterically I am so sick of trying so sick of getting slapped for being good why bother why bother I feel like I will get now where ever!
How come when I do drugs and fuck everything in sight and have no purpose but to admire the trains at 3am coming into New Orleans that everything goes hunky dory I have tons of money and friends and drugs...oh you better believe it!
But of course, I wasn't "really" happy.
As happy as smack can make a person.
Now I lov emy job, I lov emy boyfriend, I love my friends. I love that I like them and can have fun without being high....it's an amazing thing when you don't have to get drunk or stoned or coked up to have a great time with your friends. It's just...I want to go to see a dentist. I want to get a second car (course I should probalby get my license first) I want to go to London with my firned Lori and her husband. I want to go to Vidal sassoon and not feel guilty. I want to paint my kitchen and not think about the fucking price of fucking paint!
I hate money its so dirty and ugle and american, but we need it to go.
I hate it's hold on me, how it can change everything, how I can save and save and be good and the minute I decide to do something for ME I get fucked enormously....
I bend to pick up the shiny quarter, and get a 15 unch cock in my ass.
Fuck!
And now off to some lovely layout of a fucking ugly book we are publishing....god it frustrates me it is sooooo ugly.
VIEW 12 of 12 COMMENTS
indie:
Happy Birthday Colette.. I hope
bob_dobalina:
hope you had a wonderful birthday