i have a confession to make. when i said i gave it all i lied. i sit here with a hollow heart and a head ready to explode. i try to breathe the air, but my lungs fill with smoke. the house on the hill just off the shoreline, i watch it burn to ash. even with this fire, i've never felt a may this cold. the water chills me further than i already am. i walk until the ocean covers my head, but i do not stop. i try to breathe the air, but my lungs fill with water. i continue to walk. i close my eyes. as the connection between my heart and head sever, a smile comes to my face. the widest fucking grin you've ever seen. all of this for one brief moment of self-actualization. one passing moment of understanding. i open my eyes and shut my mouth. a world of gray enters and it makes sense. we now share an end, the house and i. one in fire, one in flood. everything fades around the edges and i feel pity. i am glad i will not be able to share what i have seen. before the lack of oxygen gets to my brain i have a confession to make. that house was built to burn.
i've become such a recluse.
i've become such a recluse.