I hate results day, it builds up the mountain of loneliness that I dwell upon and makes me question my exsistence. This would sound kind of understandable if it was my results day, but it's not it's my sisters results day. Its just this bitter sibbling rivarly we've had for so long, the thing that drives me up the wall is her attitude of perfection, that and the fact she is the only intial source of my insecurity that I can identify, my mother once identified this too, but never truly spoke about it. My mother and sister have also always been two pushing factors both pushing me in the direction of the other, the walls just coming closer and closer, I suppose I've became claustrophobic in this sense of space I live in. I have never managed to build my walls up, mixed meatphors I know, to defend me from it all and now I feel less and less stable as those my foundations are weak, my roots are rotting, as though I have not much at all to keep me here in this place.
