Woo, Party! Um, yeah so I had a pre 4th of july party tonight. It was less than spectacular. No bad, but nothing really worthy of the title "Party" More like a slightly bigger and more disorganized hang out session. I know Core and 'Zamna are going, "Oh! So exactly like every party you've ever had. You fucking loser." Okay, maybe not that exactly, but close, like atleast three or four of those words are in thier thoughts. So anyway, here is what I've learned over the past couple of parties.
1. Plan as far ahead as possible or not at all. If everybody knows thier coming to a party on a day like a week or two in advance, they tend to be more prepaired and thus less concerns more fun. Or throw the shit together on the same day. Some of the best parties I've had have beed same day events, when it worked. If it dosen't you're left with nothing but a few grumbling friends wondering where all the fucking females are (even though you only know a few and they already have boy friends, but whatever) and no fun, but if it pays off its a blast!
2. Girls! As stupid or obvious as it sounds, you need these fine lovely creatures at your party. If you don't have a couple at least than its not a party, its a bunch of dudes hangign out. Which is fine, and can be mad fun, but is not by any means a party.
3. Alcohol! I don't drink. So for years I considered beer and its cousins to be unnessisary extravagences for parties. Foolishly expecting everyone to be able, as I, to have a god time without them. Wrong! Without booze, the party sucks! The girls (see above) won't relax. They certainly won't get unexpectedly nekkid! This is unacceptable, first because everyone wants nekkid girls at their parties, and second, because if there are no nekkid girls the men who really want to see them are now grumpy. This further decesses the partyness of your party.
uh, i guess 4. Make sure everybody knows what time your shit starts! Nothing kills the party mood faster than (well okay, somethings kill faster than this but work with me) a small group of guests showing up early and wondering when the hell anyone else is coming, if at all! It throws off the party equalibrium of the group, with the earlycomers passing into late party mode while any new arrivals are still in just got to the party mode, with all the annoying feet shuffling or overblown Party Madness that comes with it. Late party moders have no tolerence for this and will become surly and leave, confusing early party moders and forcing them in turn to leave. No one gets nekkid, lots of leftovers, BAD PARTY!
5. This step is optional, but i recommend finding a girl, and making out with her. You can have fun at a party without doing this, I have for years, but I am sure that if more people included this step in more parties the world would be a better place. This step includes you ladies too! If neccissary replace "Girl" with "Guy" But if you are really dedicated to making a great party, follow as written. Or repeat frequently throughout the duration of the party. Provided this doesn't cause extreme jelousy. That can make for a fun night watching a drunken brawl, not partying.
Um, yeah. So follow my rules and have some kick ass parties you fuckin lunatics! And bear in mind these are just the bare bones, add music, pools, games, karaoke, naked twister, food, salad tongs, 3D Doritoes, porn, strippers, live sex shows, antiques, tupperware, name that statutory rapist, barking dogs, fluffy kitties, Jr. Varsety Girls vollyball teams(for you hentai fans), The internet, movies, books, ciggaretts and/or cigars, lawn furnature, a midget, corn syrup, and/or any other things that apply to your particular group as needed for flavor. Cover and stir occasionally over an... Um, wait. No that joke sucks to much to keep in this entry, but I want people to know I made that desicion so i'm going to write it backwards to null its existence ...na revo yllanoisacco rits dna revoC . Done! whew, that was close. So yeah have fun people.
Holy shit! I just reread this, I've really lost my fucking mind. The crazyest part? I'm hitting the "Save Entry" button right....now!
1. Plan as far ahead as possible or not at all. If everybody knows thier coming to a party on a day like a week or two in advance, they tend to be more prepaired and thus less concerns more fun. Or throw the shit together on the same day. Some of the best parties I've had have beed same day events, when it worked. If it dosen't you're left with nothing but a few grumbling friends wondering where all the fucking females are (even though you only know a few and they already have boy friends, but whatever) and no fun, but if it pays off its a blast!
2. Girls! As stupid or obvious as it sounds, you need these fine lovely creatures at your party. If you don't have a couple at least than its not a party, its a bunch of dudes hangign out. Which is fine, and can be mad fun, but is not by any means a party.
3. Alcohol! I don't drink. So for years I considered beer and its cousins to be unnessisary extravagences for parties. Foolishly expecting everyone to be able, as I, to have a god time without them. Wrong! Without booze, the party sucks! The girls (see above) won't relax. They certainly won't get unexpectedly nekkid! This is unacceptable, first because everyone wants nekkid girls at their parties, and second, because if there are no nekkid girls the men who really want to see them are now grumpy. This further decesses the partyness of your party.
uh, i guess 4. Make sure everybody knows what time your shit starts! Nothing kills the party mood faster than (well okay, somethings kill faster than this but work with me) a small group of guests showing up early and wondering when the hell anyone else is coming, if at all! It throws off the party equalibrium of the group, with the earlycomers passing into late party mode while any new arrivals are still in just got to the party mode, with all the annoying feet shuffling or overblown Party Madness that comes with it. Late party moders have no tolerence for this and will become surly and leave, confusing early party moders and forcing them in turn to leave. No one gets nekkid, lots of leftovers, BAD PARTY!
5. This step is optional, but i recommend finding a girl, and making out with her. You can have fun at a party without doing this, I have for years, but I am sure that if more people included this step in more parties the world would be a better place. This step includes you ladies too! If neccissary replace "Girl" with "Guy" But if you are really dedicated to making a great party, follow as written. Or repeat frequently throughout the duration of the party. Provided this doesn't cause extreme jelousy. That can make for a fun night watching a drunken brawl, not partying.
Um, yeah. So follow my rules and have some kick ass parties you fuckin lunatics! And bear in mind these are just the bare bones, add music, pools, games, karaoke, naked twister, food, salad tongs, 3D Doritoes, porn, strippers, live sex shows, antiques, tupperware, name that statutory rapist, barking dogs, fluffy kitties, Jr. Varsety Girls vollyball teams(for you hentai fans), The internet, movies, books, ciggaretts and/or cigars, lawn furnature, a midget, corn syrup, and/or any other things that apply to your particular group as needed for flavor. Cover and stir occasionally over an... Um, wait. No that joke sucks to much to keep in this entry, but I want people to know I made that desicion so i'm going to write it backwards to null its existence ...na revo yllanoisacco rits dna revoC . Done! whew, that was close. So yeah have fun people.
Holy shit! I just reread this, I've really lost my fucking mind. The crazyest part? I'm hitting the "Save Entry" button right....now!
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
TAKE THAT!
sometimes kinda lonley bein the only fool that updates his shit on this site anymore. (maybe I should consider moving over to livejournal... nah, uh-uhh, screw that...)