Dear Photoshop,
You still suck, and I still hate you, go die. While you're at it, take Insecurity with you. Pull a Groundhog's Day and drive off a cliff in a beat ass old Ford pickup like Bill Murray. Oh wait, no, even better, hangout in a bad horror movie, one of you can get killed by a band saw in an old shed that mysteriously has power, and the other can "fall" down a set of stairs onto a huge box of sewing supplies being impaled by 3 pairs of scissors and like a thousand needles. Fuck Ya, do that and film it and have Self confidence mail it to me.
Dear Curves,
You rock. Stick around for a bit and hangout. You're good at lookin sexy and you should punch Scrawny in the face, Just sayin. Infact, we should destroy the modern entertainment empire because it belittles you and makes women feel like you are bad. Curves, you're hot, don't let the man get you down. You and Booty and Rack are awesome. We should hangout more, like all the time. How's tonight sound?
Dear Tattoos,
You kick ass. I'm pretty into you. Not particularly any one specific style, just the whole thing, Even bad ones. Preferably something original, but really, anything is pretty much ok. Stupid ones, funny ones, distasteful ones, slutty ones and most of all, sexy ones. Flowers and other plat type things are neat, Critters are good, anything related to music is good, I.E. band logos and qoutes, Quotes in general are kinda fun. Clever phrases and clever places to put them are awesome. In general you rock.
Dear Heartbreak,
I hate you, stop hurting already, and talk to that girl and tell her she's mean for bringing it up yet again.
"I never stopped loving you" is not nearly as nice a sentiment as it sounds in your head when you're drunk and think it's a good idea to text. It's kinda like stabbing a deep scar, it hurts in a weird way because the nerves are damaged. Kinda tingles but down to the muscle tissue so it's better because it hurts less and worse becuase it hurts deeper than it should.
Dear Insomnia,
Ha ha! I won again, and I will keep winning because Whiskey can totally kick your ass, so just give up and go home already, no one likes you anyways. Ya that's right, I'm talking to you. If people wanted to hang out with you they would do Speed or lots of Blow. See you tonight, Me and whiskey will be there, and it's on.
Dear Jazz,
I never stopped loving you either. You knew that, you just didn't care until now because you're leaving, and don't know how to handle the fact that you'll be too far away to call me when you want me to come home. You'll never be too far, and I'll always be waiting. I kinda hate you for that.
You still suck, and I still hate you, go die. While you're at it, take Insecurity with you. Pull a Groundhog's Day and drive off a cliff in a beat ass old Ford pickup like Bill Murray. Oh wait, no, even better, hangout in a bad horror movie, one of you can get killed by a band saw in an old shed that mysteriously has power, and the other can "fall" down a set of stairs onto a huge box of sewing supplies being impaled by 3 pairs of scissors and like a thousand needles. Fuck Ya, do that and film it and have Self confidence mail it to me.

Dear Curves,
You rock. Stick around for a bit and hangout. You're good at lookin sexy and you should punch Scrawny in the face, Just sayin. Infact, we should destroy the modern entertainment empire because it belittles you and makes women feel like you are bad. Curves, you're hot, don't let the man get you down. You and Booty and Rack are awesome. We should hangout more, like all the time. How's tonight sound?

Dear Tattoos,
You kick ass. I'm pretty into you. Not particularly any one specific style, just the whole thing, Even bad ones. Preferably something original, but really, anything is pretty much ok. Stupid ones, funny ones, distasteful ones, slutty ones and most of all, sexy ones. Flowers and other plat type things are neat, Critters are good, anything related to music is good, I.E. band logos and qoutes, Quotes in general are kinda fun. Clever phrases and clever places to put them are awesome. In general you rock.

Dear Heartbreak,
I hate you, stop hurting already, and talk to that girl and tell her she's mean for bringing it up yet again.
"I never stopped loving you" is not nearly as nice a sentiment as it sounds in your head when you're drunk and think it's a good idea to text. It's kinda like stabbing a deep scar, it hurts in a weird way because the nerves are damaged. Kinda tingles but down to the muscle tissue so it's better because it hurts less and worse becuase it hurts deeper than it should.

Dear Insomnia,
Ha ha! I won again, and I will keep winning because Whiskey can totally kick your ass, so just give up and go home already, no one likes you anyways. Ya that's right, I'm talking to you. If people wanted to hang out with you they would do Speed or lots of Blow. See you tonight, Me and whiskey will be there, and it's on.

Dear Jazz,
I never stopped loving you either. You knew that, you just didn't care until now because you're leaving, and don't know how to handle the fact that you'll be too far away to call me when you want me to come home. You'll never be too far, and I'll always be waiting. I kinda hate you for that.
