Retreat

2

I'm strongly considering withdrawing almost entirely from the internet. No visiting cam sites, leaving social media, deleting Tumblr, etc. I don't know how much longer I can keep doing this. I try so hard to battle my depression and I'm losing just the same. I can't find anywhere I feel I actually belong and it's painful to even pretend. I know I've said something along...
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bashley:
*hugs* I realize it's been some time since you posted this but if you ever need an ear I'm happy to listen. Sometimes we just need to step back and recharge. I hope you're doing better! and know you're not alone in your struggle. Even i have days where I battle depression and I'll try to secluded myself. I'm a extrovert with learned introverted tendices. Like I said sometime I just need to recharge myself. ♡

Talking

3

I kinda feel like I should stop trying to talk or message people online, including here. Like maybe I should only speak to anyone if I am directly spoken to first, otherwise I just leave everyone alone. I'd still like photosets but just not say anything. I'd maybe still post but just not towards or reply to anyone. Maybe this would be better for everyone...

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apropoetic:
@chef Nothing here. Kinda complicated I guess but I have a lot of severe depression and anxiety problems and self-hate. Talking online is my only outlet but I always feel like I'm annoying people and I take things really hard and personal. So when I reach out to people, comment and such and get negative responses they reaffirm all those feelings and I just want to shut down and give up, especially when it comes from someone I really like.
chef:
Well self deprecation never gets you very far. I wish you sunshine and happiness ☀️☀️😘

Comments

2

I wonder what the girls here on this site like to hear as far as comments on their content, especially their photosets, like I know nothing crude, negative or really overly critical. I often just post simple comments about how beautiful a girl or her set is but do you like something more specific? Would you want any critique at all from viewers so long...
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chef:
Just be genuine.  Comment on what you would like to.    I usually say to keep comments to visuals and not what you would like to do to her, with her body, etc.    it could help to follow some members that have been here for a while like @littlejohn22 @thekarmaguy  @wizard0 and look at what they say to the girls as a guideline of what is appreciated by the girls.  
wizard0:
I usually compliment with the thought that this is someone's mother, daughter, sister, wife, etc, and avoid being crude.  If it's a pic on someone's wall and I know that the person might find that kind of comment humorous, then I might get a bit more ribald.

Tuesday

3

At the suggestion of a select few... I'm trying to start reposting some of the things I've written over the years. I deleted it all recently and have done so elsewhere in the past. I don't think I'm any good and nobody else ever seemed to either, but if you feel like checking any of it out:

http://apropoetic.tumblr.com/

Hospital

4

For those who don't know I just spent the last four days in a hospital bed. My blood sugar was over 500 and cholesterol was so bad it caused pancreatitis which is an inflammation of the pancreas and diabetic ketoacidosis. Before going to the hospital Thursday I had been laying in bed since Monday in extreme back and abdominal pain, barely able to eat. I...
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VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
caraphernelia:
hope you're gonna be okay :(
apropoetic:
@pimenta @caraphernelia I really appreciate the concern. I don't know if I'll be okay to be honest. As sad as it sounds, I dislike myself too much to fix the things that are killing me.

Saturday

1

The way people are is breaking me. I can't seem to survive in the real world and it seems like people don't want me in the digital one either. I have tried so so hard to be positive towards others despite having such a resounding hatred of myself and yet to so many people that never seemed to matter. I have been accused of so...
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Things seem to get worse.

0

So... along with the numerous health and financial issues I've been dealing with for quite some time, things still seem to get worse. I was wavering about quitting my job for my health and I knew they likely wouldn't keep me much longer, but changed my mind and decided I'd keep trying. The very day I decided that, which was Monday March 28th, I was...
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Saturday

0

Everything hurts in this world and there's no joy to be had. I hope that's just the case for me.

cardinalfire:
Dude, it's hard though sometimes you got to try and look for the what good there is or try and make some changes. Like the song says 'everybody hurts' at some point or another. Did you see she retweeted you? That video was so funny. Take easy, don't give up entirely. See you next time in chat.

Women...You know not what power you possess.

2

The blog title sums it up so well.

So many of you women have no idea the godly power you wield, or could wield if you only knew you had it all along. Each woman has her own traits and skills at her disposal. I may come off a little shallow here, but you have to know physical beauty is one of them. I as...
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mortis322:
Yup! You summed it up greatly. 

Wednesday

1

Reached 28 without a date and it's too late to start.

Relegated to my fate, an unbroken but empty heart.

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