antipode3141592

Holy christ. She was still seeing her ex-fiance... when I first met her, I didn't pursue her because I knew that she had a boyfriend (and later I found out that they were engaged). and then sometime later, when we became closer friends, I found out that he had left her for another girl. At least, that's what she told me. But it was all a lie. She was seeing the both of us for a little over a month before the shit finally hit the fan. last wednesday she finally broke down and told us what the hell was going on. she told me last. and she was so distraught, and didn't know what to do. so i told her that she should do whatever she needs to do to be happy. even if that means leaving me completely and going to him... i just didn't want her to miss an opportunity for happiness. but she was still so confused... so afraid. she wanted to run away. run away from all of them pain that she had caused everyone. from all of the lies. but i told her that she should go to him. i wanted her so much, and i didn't want her to ever leave, but i told her to go, because i thought that would be the best thing to do, especially if she couldn't rid herself of all the confusion. but in the end, she chose me. she chose me.
i should feel betrayed. i should be crying my eyes out. i should be losing my mind and lashing out in a blind rage. but i love her. i love her so completely and utterly that i can't feel those things. i only want her to be happy. to be content with the choices she has made. i want her to not have to lie anymore. i love her.