So right now, literally the moment that I am typing this I am on the 9:32 from Reading to Exeter. I am listening to an odd mix of music that began with Lady Gaga, then went to the French film operatic version of Les Choristas and now finds itself running though Alice Coopers greatest hits. Next up Vivaldi. I am meant to be doing work on my Certificate in Financial Planning but instead I realise that this 2 hours is a useful time to write a blog.
So yea, where to begin. I feel my pet and I are really going through some nice moments in our relationship following some honest conversations and some loving cuddles. I love Secretary very much, especially because she is encouraging me to torture the bitch hard for me as I travel to go and see my bitch at Exeter University. My bitch is most masochistic but young and uncertain, but I have always believed that she had the potential, aptitude and attitude to be a most entertaining addition to my life. I have no love for her, frankly I could not care much for her, but she fulfils a certain sadistic side of me that I cannot wait to express. I think she is very lucky to have Sir, for she is average looking and whilst mathematically smart does not approach my (or Secs) smarts. Meanwhile, my gf, my pet and my Mistress (all Secretary) write me a mixture of encouraging, sexy and loving texts. I have never been sure about Secs attitude toward a purely open relationship, but after much thought I came to the following conclusions:
I love my girlfriend and she loves me, and no amount of sex will change that (unless she becomes abstinent, then we might need to have a chat... lol)
My girlfriend is a beautiful creature, a tabula rasa (I made her this way because when we first met she was a wreck on the verge on suicide, but I saved her )who I have turned into a beautiful piece of art. Art is to be admired, appreciated and desired. I have turn(er)ed her (haha, lame artsy joke) into such beauty that it seems selfish to keep her to myself. Furthermore, I love having something no1 else can. They can have Secs body, but her soul, her heart and her wonderful mind are mine
Sec could only love somebody smarter than herself with very specific abilities. She already knocks on the door of true understanding, a concept most people will never even dream of grasping. Yet, sometimes (most of the time) I accidentally make her feel at best average, and at worse moronic because of my intelligence. Couple this with her traits of mood swings, massive sulks and needy nature and I feel certain I have a USP few people could hope to equal. That said, I am but one man, and she has many needs. Just as she is one girl and I have many. Since deciding to train up this bitch in Exeter I have become so much more empowered, forceful and uncompromising that the last time Sec and I had sex was amazing
cheers my special little pet.
Finally, Ive been thinking in a selfish manner. I am essentially emotionless but for extremes. Sex (and anger) is a time for me to feel, and I love it. I am not a nymphomaniac but I could happily have sex 6/7/8 times daily. I seek pleasure in sex, and my Sec makes me feel so happy when we do it I always find myself wanting it, I am addicted to her
. However, she is vice versa, highly emotional in society but cold in sex. To her sex is a thing, it can bought and sold, used and abused, which is how I feel in general, but not with Sec. With her, no matter who is being fucked, it feels emotionally amazing. Fuck off do I cry or any of that crap, we hardly ever make love (yuk @ the 3 times in 3 years), but I feel, and that is so overwhelming to experience emotions that I desire nothing else but Sec and what she brings.
Meanwhile, despite who we fuck, how many people, which gender and in which guise, nothing matters or means anything more than one simple fact: When the day has been and gone, when the sweat has left our skin and we cruel into bed exhausted but euphoric, it isnt the person who made us superficially happy for an hour or 2 we desire, but each other. Knowing she will return to me gives me the confidence, the security, and even the pleasure, to know she is out there enjoying her freedoms (as I will shortly b...) but still eagerly excited about returning to her stability Androgyne
I Knew monogamy was not for me. I have cheated so many times because no single person can make me happy, I am much too complex, and frankly it is amazing what Sec can and has achieved. Believe it or not she has taught me everything from comparable humility (I did say comparable) to dominant security. I understand more of humanity than I ever could have, and she is the water that sustains me and cools my fiery rage. Society owes a debt to Sec they will never know is due.
God the Four Seasons really are beautiful. I have Dvorak and his New World Concerto shortly, I have a total thing for strings and piano (I adore Bach for his controlled emotion and Liszt for his wonderful power and playful subtleties)
My bitch is currently performing proof on pure maths equations. She is most excited but suspects she will not b doing much maths over the next few days; she is probably right to guess as much. She will be sleeping next to me on the floor where she both longs to be and ought to be. In public I will be her voice, and in private I will be her world. In her submission to me she will be so happy and content that she will beg for me to make her better. She could b better, and she knows it, and she knows that I will make her the best submissive she can be, and when I gift her to a dom that she deserves and who deserves her, it will fill the both of us with tremendous pride. Till then, I will take a pretty average girl and turn her into my kept little bitch. She will become a woman of such merit that a dominant will show her off with pride and benevolent love, just as I do with my pet.
Despite this, despite all my hopes for my bitch, and my plans for the next 4 days, I find myself writing Sec. This was a particularly good text I sent her 5 minutes ago, I was replying to her text, Are you just being this nice because you know Im awesome?. I said, Naw, well yea, but Ive always thought that. Its nice this, u c Ive always wanted openness, but when i have u and it, it made me worried to lost u and it. Im not worried anymore, i feel a potent mix of empowered, loving and appreciative that I have u, and that u make me this happy
And thats the beauty of constantly thinking, you inspire yourself with ideas. My sec makes me happy not just through sex. She genuinely makes me feel. We both agree I have more power in our relationship not due to Sir being more prevalent, but Because I could manage without her, albeit Id be unhappy, Id be unfeeling and lost, but she would likely be dead without me, my intellectual nihiliist who needs me. I think this is fair, as does she, but Sec, my love always, we should both do well never to underestimate your importance to my heart, youre calming effect on my soul and your increasingly impressive battles with my intellect. Without you it is possible I could be a great many things, but I am certain happy would not be one of them
I love you my very special little pet.
Miluji te
So yea, where to begin. I feel my pet and I are really going through some nice moments in our relationship following some honest conversations and some loving cuddles. I love Secretary very much, especially because she is encouraging me to torture the bitch hard for me as I travel to go and see my bitch at Exeter University. My bitch is most masochistic but young and uncertain, but I have always believed that she had the potential, aptitude and attitude to be a most entertaining addition to my life. I have no love for her, frankly I could not care much for her, but she fulfils a certain sadistic side of me that I cannot wait to express. I think she is very lucky to have Sir, for she is average looking and whilst mathematically smart does not approach my (or Secs) smarts. Meanwhile, my gf, my pet and my Mistress (all Secretary) write me a mixture of encouraging, sexy and loving texts. I have never been sure about Secs attitude toward a purely open relationship, but after much thought I came to the following conclusions:
I love my girlfriend and she loves me, and no amount of sex will change that (unless she becomes abstinent, then we might need to have a chat... lol)
My girlfriend is a beautiful creature, a tabula rasa (I made her this way because when we first met she was a wreck on the verge on suicide, but I saved her )who I have turned into a beautiful piece of art. Art is to be admired, appreciated and desired. I have turn(er)ed her (haha, lame artsy joke) into such beauty that it seems selfish to keep her to myself. Furthermore, I love having something no1 else can. They can have Secs body, but her soul, her heart and her wonderful mind are mine
Sec could only love somebody smarter than herself with very specific abilities. She already knocks on the door of true understanding, a concept most people will never even dream of grasping. Yet, sometimes (most of the time) I accidentally make her feel at best average, and at worse moronic because of my intelligence. Couple this with her traits of mood swings, massive sulks and needy nature and I feel certain I have a USP few people could hope to equal. That said, I am but one man, and she has many needs. Just as she is one girl and I have many. Since deciding to train up this bitch in Exeter I have become so much more empowered, forceful and uncompromising that the last time Sec and I had sex was amazing
cheers my special little pet.
Finally, Ive been thinking in a selfish manner. I am essentially emotionless but for extremes. Sex (and anger) is a time for me to feel, and I love it. I am not a nymphomaniac but I could happily have sex 6/7/8 times daily. I seek pleasure in sex, and my Sec makes me feel so happy when we do it I always find myself wanting it, I am addicted to her
. However, she is vice versa, highly emotional in society but cold in sex. To her sex is a thing, it can bought and sold, used and abused, which is how I feel in general, but not with Sec. With her, no matter who is being fucked, it feels emotionally amazing. Fuck off do I cry or any of that crap, we hardly ever make love (yuk @ the 3 times in 3 years), but I feel, and that is so overwhelming to experience emotions that I desire nothing else but Sec and what she brings.
Meanwhile, despite who we fuck, how many people, which gender and in which guise, nothing matters or means anything more than one simple fact: When the day has been and gone, when the sweat has left our skin and we cruel into bed exhausted but euphoric, it isnt the person who made us superficially happy for an hour or 2 we desire, but each other. Knowing she will return to me gives me the confidence, the security, and even the pleasure, to know she is out there enjoying her freedoms (as I will shortly b...
) but still eagerly excited about returning to her stability Androgyne
I Knew monogamy was not for me. I have cheated so many times because no single person can make me happy, I am much too complex, and frankly it is amazing what Sec can and has achieved. Believe it or not she has taught me everything from comparable humility (I did say comparable) to dominant security. I understand more of humanity than I ever could have, and she is the water that sustains me and cools my fiery rage. Society owes a debt to Sec they will never know is due.
God the Four Seasons really are beautiful. I have Dvorak and his New World Concerto shortly, I have a total thing for strings and piano (I adore Bach for his controlled emotion and Liszt for his wonderful power and playful subtleties)
My bitch is currently performing proof on pure maths equations. She is most excited but suspects she will not b doing much maths over the next few days; she is probably right to guess as much. She will be sleeping next to me on the floor where she both longs to be and ought to be. In public I will be her voice, and in private I will be her world. In her submission to me she will be so happy and content that she will beg for me to make her better. She could b better, and she knows it, and she knows that I will make her the best submissive she can be, and when I gift her to a dom that she deserves and who deserves her, it will fill the both of us with tremendous pride. Till then, I will take a pretty average girl and turn her into my kept little bitch. She will become a woman of such merit that a dominant will show her off with pride and benevolent love, just as I do with my pet.
Despite this, despite all my hopes for my bitch, and my plans for the next 4 days, I find myself writing Sec. This was a particularly good text I sent her 5 minutes ago, I was replying to her text, Are you just being this nice because you know Im awesome?. I said, Naw, well yea, but Ive always thought that. Its nice this, u c Ive always wanted openness, but when i have u and it, it made me worried to lost u and it. Im not worried anymore, i feel a potent mix of empowered, loving and appreciative that I have u, and that u make me this happy
And thats the beauty of constantly thinking, you inspire yourself with ideas. My sec makes me happy not just through sex. She genuinely makes me feel. We both agree I have more power in our relationship not due to Sir being more prevalent, but Because I could manage without her, albeit Id be unhappy, Id be unfeeling and lost, but she would likely be dead without me, my intellectual nihiliist who needs me. I think this is fair, as does she, but Sec, my love always, we should both do well never to underestimate your importance to my heart, youre calming effect on my soul and your increasingly impressive battles with my intellect. Without you it is possible I could be a great many things, but I am certain happy would not be one of them
I love you my very special little pet.
Miluji te