This update is chock fulla photo goodness. Let it load, Slow connections...please? 
Im sitting on the floor, in front of the old assed machine in the corner of my room. Old being from 98. Scratch that, 97, I think.
Its hard to remember. 98, probably. Maybe 97. Late 97. Either way, its old.
Ive got it set up on a coffee table, Japanese-style, as Guey calls it.
Next to the monitor is an ashtray, smokes filtering across the screen.
Not two feet from my ciggy is a buttload of gunpowder. Dont ask.
On the floor to my right is my scanner. Sitting next to it makes me wanna scan something.
The only problem with that is then I have to put it on a floppy and take it to the main computer in the well, computer room to do anything with it.
The computer in my room, its a glorified typewriter, nothing else, really.
Dictionary, Flip Dictionary, Dictionary of Thoughts (confiscated from my father), all tucked nicely underneath.
Ive got, roughly, an hour before my faux veal is done cooking. Rice cooling in the microwave.
Can of Coke fizzling behind me.
Atmosphere playing.
The porn catalogue I scanned a while back is mingling with the gay catalogue I scanned day-before-yesterday.
That new credit card has put the devil on me. I-all-at-once realized, with my new found finances (soon-to-be-debts) that I could get that spiffy new Canon DV Cam.
The one Ive lusted over for so long.
That I can get a new capture card, some spiffy new editing software.
I can piddle it away if I wanted. I can get bunch o' clothes, new music, DVDs, porn (oh, the evil, evil porn *throws porn catalogue across the room *).
I can piddle it away and get a LOAN to consolidate my debts! You knowget a loan to get me out of debt.
This is the kind of logic I come up with, alone and bored and horny and stuff.
My brilliant financial scam.
But Im not going to. This goddamnit, I can get that camera.if I wanted to. Ebay, you dirty bastard.
In yesterdays paper I read that the Miss America Organization (heh) is planning on doing a pageant featuring Teen aged girls.
Oh, ephebophiles rejoice!
13-17yo girls in a fucking pageant. Competing against one another. I dont get this, this is republican shit, I swear.
Because a girl, a teenaged girl, doesnt have enough self esteem issues as it is, she has to be paraded around as such.
And we thought eating disorders were rampant now
I already see suicides skyrocketing.
Theyre not gonna have a swimsuit competition. Not because having a 13yo girl parading around, being JUDGED in a bathing suit might be considered lewd or in bad taste, but because We just didnt feel that a 13-year-old competing with a 17-year-old in a swimsuit was fair.
Fair.
Atleast shes (the chairman of the organization is a woman) acknowledging theres a DISTINCT fucking DIFFERENCE in the DEVELOPMENT of the girls at that age. Atleast theyre acknowledging the fact that a girl, straight out of puberty, not allowed to drive legally, still developing as a PERSON AS WELL AS A WOMAN might have some stiff competition from the girl whose practically fully developed.
I say practically fully developed in reference to the physical aspect. doG knows these people have a LONG FUCKING WAY to go before theyre mentally developed, fully or partially.
These people make me sick.
Wheres a radical, anarchic feminist with a firebomb when you need one?
Wheres a republican spouting rhetoric about child exploitation when you need one?
Wheres some common fucking decency when you need it?
I have, written on a receipt for no particular reason, Sigh to go, Wish to go. I havent the slightest what this means, but there it is.
It must have been important cos I wrote it down.
Still twenty minutes til my faux veal, soheres a hooker story:
Ok, so everyone needs a good hooker story, heres mine.
True story, though kinda old by about a year or so.
Sammy and I were coming back from Pekin at around 2:30 in the morning when we decided that food was in order. The only 24 hour McDonalds that we knew of was the one on Western, so thats where we were ready to go.
Sammy was driving, I was the passenger. We were on South Adams (I think) near the Harrison Homes when we hit a red light. Across the street on the corner was lady in her forties dressed in typical whore attire.
Stopped, I looked at Sam and said, Dude and motioned with my head towards the woman of the night.
Sammy looked and said, Shoulda brought yr camera
I know I said, looking back towards the lady. At that second, she looked at us and she and I locked eyes. Being the nice polite boy my mamma raised, my first reaction was to nod in her direction.
Unfortunately, this is both the international sign for, Sup aaaaaaaaaand Cmere
And she took it for the latter.
As she approached, I panicked and said to Sammy, Oh, shit, dude, here she comes
Sammy said, Got a brick? (theres a story behind this comment that I might tell after this storyif I feel like it)
The hooker came over to us and said, You lookin for something?
Smiling, I said thru clenched teeth, Nahwere fine.
She walked away, saying under her breathbut loud enough for us to hearFuckin white-boys wastin my mufukin timebein all up in my video an shit
And thats my hooker story. As cheesy and vanilla as it gets.
Ok, the brick comment.
PREFACE: This dude named Larry Bright was running around P-Town killing off whores. (this is tongue and cheek, dont get all pissy)
Ok.
With the hookers coming up missing all hookers are going out armed.
This ups the possibility of being rolled by a whore.
Thats why you should always pay whores with a twenty tied to a brick.
When you see a ho you want, just roll up, chuck the brick at her, and get yr business done.
This is all pending the brick connecting with the hookers head.
When shes out, seal the deal and leave the money.
Or leave with the money. Which is indicative of too much GTA play.
Either way.
Phototime
Im sitting on the floor, in front of the old assed machine in the corner of my room. Old being from 98. Scratch that, 97, I think.
Its hard to remember. 98, probably. Maybe 97. Late 97. Either way, its old.
Ive got it set up on a coffee table, Japanese-style, as Guey calls it.
Next to the monitor is an ashtray, smokes filtering across the screen.
Not two feet from my ciggy is a buttload of gunpowder. Dont ask.
On the floor to my right is my scanner. Sitting next to it makes me wanna scan something.
The only problem with that is then I have to put it on a floppy and take it to the main computer in the well, computer room to do anything with it.
The computer in my room, its a glorified typewriter, nothing else, really.
Dictionary, Flip Dictionary, Dictionary of Thoughts (confiscated from my father), all tucked nicely underneath.
Ive got, roughly, an hour before my faux veal is done cooking. Rice cooling in the microwave.
Can of Coke fizzling behind me.
Atmosphere playing.
The porn catalogue I scanned a while back is mingling with the gay catalogue I scanned day-before-yesterday.
That new credit card has put the devil on me. I-all-at-once realized, with my new found finances (soon-to-be-debts) that I could get that spiffy new Canon DV Cam.
The one Ive lusted over for so long.
That I can get a new capture card, some spiffy new editing software.
I can piddle it away if I wanted. I can get bunch o' clothes, new music, DVDs, porn (oh, the evil, evil porn *throws porn catalogue across the room *).
I can piddle it away and get a LOAN to consolidate my debts! You knowget a loan to get me out of debt.
This is the kind of logic I come up with, alone and bored and horny and stuff.
My brilliant financial scam.
But Im not going to. This goddamnit, I can get that camera.if I wanted to. Ebay, you dirty bastard.
In yesterdays paper I read that the Miss America Organization (heh) is planning on doing a pageant featuring Teen aged girls.
Oh, ephebophiles rejoice!
13-17yo girls in a fucking pageant. Competing against one another. I dont get this, this is republican shit, I swear.
Because a girl, a teenaged girl, doesnt have enough self esteem issues as it is, she has to be paraded around as such.
And we thought eating disorders were rampant now
I already see suicides skyrocketing.
Theyre not gonna have a swimsuit competition. Not because having a 13yo girl parading around, being JUDGED in a bathing suit might be considered lewd or in bad taste, but because We just didnt feel that a 13-year-old competing with a 17-year-old in a swimsuit was fair.
Fair.
Atleast shes (the chairman of the organization is a woman) acknowledging theres a DISTINCT fucking DIFFERENCE in the DEVELOPMENT of the girls at that age. Atleast theyre acknowledging the fact that a girl, straight out of puberty, not allowed to drive legally, still developing as a PERSON AS WELL AS A WOMAN might have some stiff competition from the girl whose practically fully developed.
I say practically fully developed in reference to the physical aspect. doG knows these people have a LONG FUCKING WAY to go before theyre mentally developed, fully or partially.
These people make me sick.
Wheres a radical, anarchic feminist with a firebomb when you need one?
Wheres a republican spouting rhetoric about child exploitation when you need one?
Wheres some common fucking decency when you need it?
I have, written on a receipt for no particular reason, Sigh to go, Wish to go. I havent the slightest what this means, but there it is.
It must have been important cos I wrote it down.
Still twenty minutes til my faux veal, soheres a hooker story:
Ok, so everyone needs a good hooker story, heres mine.
True story, though kinda old by about a year or so.
Sammy and I were coming back from Pekin at around 2:30 in the morning when we decided that food was in order. The only 24 hour McDonalds that we knew of was the one on Western, so thats where we were ready to go.
Sammy was driving, I was the passenger. We were on South Adams (I think) near the Harrison Homes when we hit a red light. Across the street on the corner was lady in her forties dressed in typical whore attire.
Stopped, I looked at Sam and said, Dude and motioned with my head towards the woman of the night.
Sammy looked and said, Shoulda brought yr camera
I know I said, looking back towards the lady. At that second, she looked at us and she and I locked eyes. Being the nice polite boy my mamma raised, my first reaction was to nod in her direction.
Unfortunately, this is both the international sign for, Sup aaaaaaaaaand Cmere
And she took it for the latter.
As she approached, I panicked and said to Sammy, Oh, shit, dude, here she comes
Sammy said, Got a brick? (theres a story behind this comment that I might tell after this storyif I feel like it)
The hooker came over to us and said, You lookin for something?
Smiling, I said thru clenched teeth, Nahwere fine.
She walked away, saying under her breathbut loud enough for us to hearFuckin white-boys wastin my mufukin timebein all up in my video an shit
And thats my hooker story. As cheesy and vanilla as it gets.
Ok, the brick comment.
PREFACE: This dude named Larry Bright was running around P-Town killing off whores. (this is tongue and cheek, dont get all pissy)
Ok.
With the hookers coming up missing all hookers are going out armed.
This ups the possibility of being rolled by a whore.
Thats why you should always pay whores with a twenty tied to a brick.
When you see a ho you want, just roll up, chuck the brick at her, and get yr business done.
This is all pending the brick connecting with the hookers head.
When shes out, seal the deal and leave the money.
Or leave with the money. Which is indicative of too much GTA play.
Either way.
Phototime
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
but, i have fifteen pages of comments now, you silly man.
when I was 12 I looked like I was 17. or a college freshman.
yea.
it was amusing.