abbicon

i originally got on today, to post the first pics of my actual art, these...



then after having an epiphany about a piece i'm working on, decided to ask someone about a "favor", if you can count trying to compensate service, as a favor, this happened...

wow.

some fucking people. since i've been blocked from responding to a message, that i can't let go, let alone from contacting this person at all, i'm going to put it here, the whole conversation, it will be only slightly modified, because i don't want to name names, even though protection of the innocent doesn't apply here...
(please, anyone that has any input, it would be greatly appreciated, even [especially] if i'm the one here that's wrong)

me - ______ (_____),

you deleted me on myspace? not that i'm upset, just curious as to why?

also, and i know this is a stretch, since we never talk, but, i'm working on a painting right now, and the pictures you took of yourself in the bandanna top with the ball-bat, is fucking awesome, and would be perfect for the image that i want to use as the focal point, but, i want the figure to be nude...

so, here goes, would you, in any way, consider taking some full body shots of yourself nude, or at least topless, with the ball-bat on your shoulder, or in a bunch of different poses? if you would do it for me, i would definitely send you a quality print, i couldn't send you the original, but i would get the highest quality print i can get, and send it to you in a tube, so it would be pristine when it got to you. here's the real kicker, the painting is due on tues. next week, so i would need the pic(tures) in the next couple days, if you're not into it, i totally understand, but you're the perfect body shape, and have the perfect hair styles, everything i wanted out of the image, i would just try to draw it, but i want to collage it on, and i want it to be photo realistic, so i have to modify it in photoshop. if you would do it, and the print wouldn't be what you would want out of it, let me know what you would want out of the deal, and we can work something out.

i know this is kind of pressing, and i haven't written you in a long time, but you never responded, so i felt like i was bothering you, i still read all your blogs, and i always check out the new pics. if you're not into it for me, i'm sure everyone else would appreciate it too, none of us will ever tire of seeing your beautiful body, or your gorgeous face, and eyes, for that matter.

anyway, i hope that shit is getting better for you, i know what it's like to have people constantly shitting on you, and bringing all kinds of stupid fucking drama that's totally unnecessary, to be lonely, and bored, and have lovers leave for no reason, talk shit to make themselves look better, etc.

really, i hope shit is cool in your world. as much as i hope it gets cool in mine.

-peter (abbicon)"

her - "Dont call me ______ please its not your place too and its not even my name.
I probably deleted you because you were creepy/ arrogant / weird or a dick.
Euw you are a a fucking disgusting creep.
As if im going to send you special nudes you stupid disillusioned cunt.
How much of a disgusting letch are you, you cant just go requesting girls to you topless and nude pictures because you say you want to do a painting. After theyve deleted you because you were clearly already annoying or offensive to them. And im insulted you ask. I only do nudes for the suicidegirls site or im sure id have posted in my journely wouldnt i. God how arrogant of you to even ask. I cant fathom this. You actually think its appropriate to just ask me to take topless and nude pictures just for you.
Into what for you?
You think i take pictures for you?
Ugh go away please."
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EDIT: (note: she never got this last piece, i was blocked from contacting while i was writing my response, i posted it here because i needed to be rid of the anger, and hurt feelings). as pointed out by a good friend, i was reactionary, and i could've handled it better, but i have a hard time being insulted, without retorting in kind. i'm working on it.
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me - "actually, i was nothing but supportive, and i hadn't crossed any lines until apparently just now, i'm having a hard time being sorry, because you're such a fucking diluted cunt, that has no idea what you're talking about, that being said, this will be the last message/comment/etc. that i ever send you, if art is creepy, and lecherous, not only are you an idiot, but you're also a whore, selling yourself for less than you're worth. asking a model that poses nude to pose nude, is nothing out of the ordinary, from an artist to a model, apparently, not only are you a complete fucking idiot, bordering on illiteracy, but you also have no concept of what the differences between lechery, creativity, and appreciation are.

don't worry though, i wouldn't waste a second more of my time on a plebeian like you, save to respond to the bullshit insulting message you just sent me back.

for whatever it's worth, i am sorry that you were offended, that i called you by what i thought was your name, and that you think that it was for anything more than a painting, that you think that i feel like i'm some egotistical perv, constantly irritating and being creepy to women. if you knew anything about me, you'd know it's exactly the opposite. not like you'll be looking, but i'll be posting that painting in about a week."

my apologies, even after the insults i had to throw back, but i don't allow myself to be irrationally insulted because someone has baggage that has nothing to do with me. i'm even sorry for that.

sorry, and goodbye."

again, if anyone thinks i was out of line, rip me a new asshole, or calmly explain to me, what the fucking problem is, 'cause i'm still kind of in shock. i'm the kind of guy that goes out of my way, to make sure women aren't made uncomfortable by me, and because it's more than important, i'll share with you all why...

1 of 3 women will be raped in her lifetime, those aren't good odds, and, just as sad as that is, every girlfriend i've ever had, and most that i've known, have been either sexually abused as a youth, or raped in their teen or adult life. not to mention the fact that most men have no respect for women, and stare, make inappropriate comments, slap asses or grab tits, when it's totally fucking wrong, intrusive, insulting, and proves the total lack of respect for women as equals as a majority view, between all of the fucking douche bag men out there, that not only teach their children the same behavior, but are the people running this country, as well as many others.

wow. yeah. somebody say something, PLEASE...

i don't know what else to say.