What can I say. Things are looking up for me! Slowly but surely. One of the first people I met on this site has really become a great friend to me. When it comes to friendships, I'm not gonna lie, I'm not the easiest to be around. I suppose I tend to rely on people too hard, without realising it. Its one thing to make good friends, but another thing to alienate them. As I've found, this person is un-alienate-able. As a result, I've come to terms with a few things I've found irreconcilable up until now. Things I couldn't admit to myself, let alone to another person; but, for some reason, actually forming it in your head, and even going as far as to realise it, in the form of the written word, does a lot of good. I suppose, in a way, its cathartic. To confront inner demons that you long ago labelled as off-limits. I suppose the main thing is finding out that things you thought were impossible for anyone else to possibly understand or comprehend; aren't as bad as you first thought. Not quite as outlandish or messed up as you first thought. Refreshing to have things turned around. In a world where acceptance never seems to come around, its nice to find somebody of a similar persuasion; who gets the way your mind works. Vindication of thought processes that seem to be completely absent from everyday reality. The popular reality, I mean; the one I appear to be so disgruntled with. The one I've never really been able to find a place in. Letters, have become a big part of my life now. My ideas for them seem to be bordering on the infinite, and its definitely a creative outlet, one which I've never had before. For some reason, whenever my mood improves, my brain cleans itself out. Kind of like a defragmentation of my internal hard drive... If that makes sense. While SG Chat still remains a slight source of disgruntlement, I intend on returning at some stage. While feeling uncomfortable hearing about the happy love lives of people, is too difficult to take sometimes, there are a lot of people there I enjoy talking to; and I can't give them up! Much love, all you faithful blog readers! All is well
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