tubaart

wow, nice job!
and I'll take it as a compliment

Well, I found part of the draw. It's from a fuse in the engine marked .. oddly enough, "engine."

I measured the total draw from the battery, and there's more [5.8mA total]. I wasn't able to find the rest after measuring all the fuses, so I'm not sure where else to look.

a.] I had a pretty full workup done on my car, and everything was fine. All that was toast were my belts. It was their only guess. The battery seemed fine when I got it, but at this point there's obviously no way of knowing. Except I have my old battery back in my car and new belts, and it's acting better than a.] the same battery did before this whole mess, and b.] it did after the new battery got run down. So I wouldn't rule this out based on my idiot light. My lights don't come on when they're supposed to all the time for things.

b.] I have a bad seal which is bad enough that I'm losing a full tank of oil every two weeks, or faster. Well, definitely faster -- that's just the time frame I'm positive and I think it's bad enough to say that. I haven't bothered to let it get down again and time it. That started sometime after my car was fixed after an accident, last winter. The head gasket is [obviously?] another problem, but it also exists; I wasn't confused or blurring the two -- I was saying, I have both problems.

c.] I've been told my timing belt includes removing the transmission, and to put away five hundred dollars for it. I was told the same thing about the seal, so that's what I was saying about killing those birds together.

50,000 words in 30 days congrats! How have you been?! I haven't heard from you in forever!

That's not procrastination!!

I wanted to say hello! It's been a while!!

Well, actually, I am on some pretty affective medication for bipolar [II] disorder. However, the triggers of the holidays, which happen to lie in winter, can draw me into a spiral regardless. I don't combine my meds with an antidepressant the way is suggested .. so that's a lot of it. I cycle throughout the year, throughout the seasons .. it's just that winter is particularly hard for me to muscle through because it's not just "the same ol' thing" -- there is a constant trigger to it, every day for like two months.

And I work at a tanning salon [was that the irony?] -- so I know; doctors prescribe it, etc. But I tan several times a week. I'm sure it helps, but there are some things it doesn't .. help. ;/

Not saying I wouldn't mind moving away from winter. Ha.

That is actually nearly exactly the feeling! I was surprised the whole time while reading your description of it, because .. ironically, it did that very thing for me [only, regarding itself and not my topic, unfortunately] -- made me think of it in terms of .. the way a water drop finds its first path down your skin, and then over and over, no matter how many times you try to slide a water droplet down another path, it will go the same way it first went. Over and over and over, down what's familiar. Where it's been already. Sometimes even when you start a little to the left or right, it meets up where it'd been previously and follows it down, and you're like. Fuck.

But I totally agree. And this is what I've been trying for [not the water droplets, but you know ;/] -- emptying my brain of the old stuff, shaking it off .. and reapproaching. Because, my old thoughts were so heavily filtered and full of excuses for the situation, full of denial, .. that they are -nearly- untrue anyway. So when I write now I tend to cushion my words with untruths. And I don't want to. Obviously. That will give me zero closure.

That's where the mental block is coming in.

Which is a good thing -- at least the water droplet's not coursing along at top speed down the old path. It's a start.

My favorite. It saved me when I was younger. I've read it countless times now, in completion, and skimmed for the highlighted parts so many others.. that the pages are soft now.

Thanks for your lovely comment on my set

Happy belated 50th birthday wishes! Woohooo!!

Thank you for commenting my set!