saturn1

home is good, but i'm not sure it's home home anymore. i love that i have it to come back to. i love my people here. however, i do not like the snow. snow, why do you exist?

this christmas eve i will be saying goodbye to someone that i love dearly, for what is probably going to be forever. we were supposed to spend christmas together, but i guess life likes to remind you that it can change all sorts of things in one minute. it's kind like mourning a death, which is funny because a new life is what brought all...
Read More

& it came to me then that every plan is a tiny prayer to father time
as I stared at my shoes in the ICU that reeked of piss and 409
& I rationed my breathes as I said to myself that I'd already taken too much today
as each descending peak of the LCD took you a little farther away from me

amongst the...
Read More

i am currently obsessed with finding covers of 'jolene,' because i would like a to listen to more than dolly parton all day, even if all the songs are still jolene.

i quit smoking i hate myself!

silly how things go in cycles

reacquainting myself with twin peaks , my roommate and i are are going to the town tuesday to have some damn fine coffee. i am going to miss him times a million when he leaves for europe in a couple weeks. im gonna be a lonley sad lost puppy.

i wanted to be with you alone
and talk about the weeeeeather

haaaa im a hopeless...
Read More

i hate having crushes on people that are taken
i love making new friends
i think it is time to sleeeeeeeeeep

i am awake and i should be asleep because i work tonight til 6 am and i already been working since 7 am
why am i awake

thursday i get to see the fancy specialist doctor and maybe he will tell me i got cancer or lupus or something but i am willing to bet that he'll just say 'MORE TESTS' and tell me to...
Read More

i want to stay here. blaaaah

yesterday i went to see the doctor for the first time since i got discharged from the hospital. i didn't really feel much of anything when i was parking, but when i walked up to the hospital i felt some sort of panic and then i almost started crying in the lobby. i guess that shit was traumatic or...
Read More

i am cutting off my hair today, the word 'letter' is a funny sounding word and i would like a burrito. i would like to get a saturn tattooed behind my ear but i dont know who i want to do it. so maybe i will find somebody who can tattoo and likes planets today, as well.

i sure do love burritos

i am happy that i can shit now without nurses asking me if i did, when i did, how many times i did, and what it looked liked. i've mostly been enjoying that and not being poked every morning by nurses and lab people. i have to gain back 10 lbs.

it's neat.