5 things i can't live without: Sarcasm

vices: the ones on my tool bench

thoughts on sg: I love it

 

gender: male

occupation: Children's party clown. I do adult parties too, I just put the rubber nose somewhere else.

current crush: my heart is black and dead

stats: batshit crazy

heroes: Hunter S. thompson. Ernest hemingway, Sylvia plath

gets me hot: fire

favorite position: reverse cowgirl

fantasy: Who fucking cares, they never come true.

sign: I'm a loner, Dottie, a rebel

most humbling moment: when they all laughed at me and told me there was no basement in the Alamo.

i lost my virginity: in a hail of gunfire

I AM LOOKING FOR: a woman

I WANT: Romance, Booty, Friendship, Online Flirting.

MY STATUS: single

MY DIET: Omnivore

MY POLITICS: None apply, you assholes

MY DRUG USE: Drug Free

CIGARETTES: I have black lungs

ALCOHOL: I am a complete drunkard

POT: I'm a total stoner

MY KINK FACTOR: I buy sex toys at the hardware store.

MY PIGEONHOLES: Emo, Crafty, Arty, Jazz Cat, Burner, Retro, Hillbilly, Metalhead, Hippy, Rivethead, Rockabilly, Bookworm, Geek, Fetish, Fuck you, I defy categories.