emptyharbour

The things you reach for do not have places to be held; this much is certain. Now it's begun again, this staying up late and waking early with hardly any sleep between. Before, there was someone, something. Now there is just the lull of summer and my beating heart, thick with clotted blood and all the reasons I have to call. I'm terrible at keeping...
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"I do not love you except because I love you;
I go from loving to not loving you,
From waiting to not waiting for you
My heart moves from cold to fire.

I love you only because it's you the one I love;
I hate you deeply, and hating you
Bend to you, and the measure of my changing love for you
Is that I...
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Merry Christmas, kids. Hope you all enjoy the holiday season. I'm going off the grid until 2007.

All my best,
-J

Last day of classes, first day of work. The weather is terrible, my iPod is on the fritz, and I'm flying to Calgary in something like 8 hours. Blaaaarrghh.

I had that dream again, the sad one with falling stars and skipping stones. Woke up shivering in the dark, listening to a silence unheard in this house for years. Outside; snow and sunrise both claw at my window. I lay here, staring up at the shifting shadows as the last faint wisps of sleep and sorrow both bleed out into morning air, and only...
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Holy shitbat, it's November already.

It's been raining here for something like 2 weeks solid. There are warnings on the news for folks living near rivers on on slide-vulnerable hillsides. I find myself going to class less and less often, instead jumping off the bus at random stops and exploring new neighborhoods and parkland. I roam with camera in hand, and I've been very pleased...
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Late breaking news:

I drink too much.

I'm home from the bar, with drink in my blood and sorrow in my heart. Perhaps this is the sign of a poor entry. Perhaps the sign of a poor man.

Kevin is upstairs with a woman. One who is not his girlfriend, not the one I've come to appreciate the company of. Do I have any comment? Do I have any concern? I do...
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too much, too late...

Fog was beautiful this morning. I rode my bike down past Ross Bay Cemetery and out along the water, early as I could manage, before the sun burned off the mist and traffic noise ruined the calm. As I rode, I pondered my role here in Victoria; thought about who I am and what I'm doing here. It's been a few...
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I have been denied 14 positions at local hospitals, rescue crews, outreach societies and emergency response units, not because I am not qualified, but rather because I have a penis. Nobody is willing to give men a chance to VOLUNTEER for these positions. Apparently, having nobody to do the job at all is preferable to having a male do it.

I am not sure if...
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