djbq

*hug*

Hate yourself all you want , but I think yer still waaaaaaaaaay nifty and cute..

Its good to see you back, although it sucks that your trip wasnt that great..

reading your journal entries is exhausting. and i know i say this every time but DONT WORRY SO MUCH! i understand its not that easy, but if theres one thing i learned when i was in the hospital, its that things have a way of working themsleves out. so you can either worry yourself to death and have things work out, or chill the fuck out and have things work out. i like door number 2.

Hey. Long time no see.

the future always looks better with a little vodka under your belt.

a little.

still missing you
hey is sky in richmond?

sounds lovely! I wanted to go to Bjork but I am too po'.
next time you go for sushi, come to Sonoda's on 6th ave and say hi to me.

You'll know it's me because I'm the only white girl working there.

Of the...once...I've had the pleasure of that kind of close company, I can say it was one of the most beautiful moments of my life. I look forward to repeating it someday.

i've always wanted to see bjork! you lucky lucky girl! well i'm sure ya deserve it- man she is so amazing- and definately somebody worth seeing live. what a manic, beautiful spectable (um, maybe that should say spectacle?) that'll be! heehee bjork! have fun,dude!
sounds like things are kind better maybe? i sure had a tumultuous week but i feel better now, all though the news is pretty fucked up with the power out (hey your'e not inthe middle of that are you?!!) well i'll assume you're not...
i remember listening to the MMarry Poppins record at this friend of mine's house as a kid- she used to play it on one of those Mickey Mouse record players-you know the kind where mickey's little arm is the stylus-we'd dance along and play to the songs, i especially liked the spoonful of sugar song! that was fun...whatcha gettin' done to your hair, cutie? !!

Good to hear you're OK. The "black hole" thing seems to have been going on for a while. You seem like a good egg, and in Denver yet! I hope all is going as well as can. Cheers. :: big smile ::

there's sure alot of shittyness in being conscious of oneself- and having to deal with the low points that are necessary for the lovey high points to exist- or so i understand. but sometimes it definately can seem like "umm, okay, enough of the shitty low points, already! were did the high points go?!!!
i actually had a rather fucked up acouple of weeks in terms of feeling totally normal at some points and then feeling that everything was totally sucking or that i was sucking- anyways i do feel better now that i don't have so much work to do- but still there's always the stuff to deal with that has nothing to do with school or work or having too much to do- i guess it's the stuff that we're usually distracted from when we're so busy with the otherthings? i don't know- but sometimes it just feels like there's always something to feel shitty about...
i don't read a heck of alot of poetry, but The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran is very good to read when i'm down and out...i'll just leave you a sample of one of his-
"Then a woman said, Speak to us of Joy and Sorrow.
And he answered:
Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.
And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears.
And how else can it be?
The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.
Is not the cup that holds your wine the very cup that was burned int the potter's oven?
And is not the lute that soothes your spirit the very wood that was hollowed with knives?
When you are joyous, look deep within your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrowthat is giving you joy.
When you are sorrowful, look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight."

sometimes this kind of stuff can at least put meaning into the seemingly chaotic and sad kind of moods i can stumble into from time to time- but then sometimes you need lots of the ice cream. in which case i highly recommend Marco's brand of Rasberry gelato.. it's fat free and organic but seriously the best freaking tastey experience i've had in a long time! in fact i think i am going to go to the store and get some 'cause now i'm all thinking about it and everything.
i hope your feelin' better doll! and keep passing those open windows! (to quote "hotel new hampshire") okay, bye for now!

i really wish i could say something that would help you with this anger thing, but only you know whats in your heart, so only you can fix it. i believe you will figure it out, though, and it will pass.

Give in to the anger...buy a punching bag and kick the shit out of it when you get pissed...works for me.
Hang in there you.