...there are complications. Old lovers dont simply disappear off
the face of the earth. You bump into them looking radiant with their
new partners as youre at the checkout treating yourself to a bumper
pack of Kleenex. You enjoy halcyon days thinking youve moved on and
matured, then suddenly they pop up again to remind you and sundry that
youre still just a hopeless shell... Read More
i ran out of breath months ago, and i'm
still underwater...
up and down have become the same, the length of the
panic of drowning has now given way to an overwhelmingly terrifying apathetic scream for mercy that plays on repeat in what's left of my quickly disintegrating mind...
there is no response...
my body and soul go weak and limp, from being racked for... Read More
i lost my two favorite people in the world, in OhNine. pieces of self lost never to be recovered.
my grandfather, a man of unsurpassed strength and beauty, left the world just days ago, leaving a hole in the world it cannot fill again, they don't make them like that any longer...
and the love of my life. a woman i will never forgive, now,... Read More
on new year's day at my parents house my uncle and cousin came to dinner. my cousin's 37 and my uncle was in his sixties, (son and dad.)
After dinner i was having a smoke on the porch with my cousin and we talked for a short while. I told him he looked good, he said the medication he was prescribed made him lose weight. He said he was looking for a place to go. I was a little surprised, he isn't someone who normally talks about anything pertinent. I told him my boss hooked me up with a nice apartment, and that maybe he would know about something. Eric (my cousin) said that would be fine. He said he didn't want to live with my uncle any more because he was such an asshole.
Which is kinda true, my uncle can be a serious pain in the ass. But more often than not and reliably he was someone my family depended on.
A week or so later, or maybe a couple days i don't really remember now, I asked one of my boss's buddies if he knew of anything in the area. He said nothing off the tip but that he'd keeps his ears open. I called my cousin and let him know I had my feelers out and he said cool, maybe he'd be coming out to my neck of the woods.
A couple of days after that my mom called me around 7 in the morning, saying that she wanted to reach me before someone who had heard the news had a chance. She told me that Eric had shot and killed my uncle and was in jail now.
My extended family are largely in the police force so we learned a little more about the investigation than was in the news. I learned that my uncle was trying to get into my cousin's locked room to make sure Eric took his medication. He shimmied the door open with a screw driver, something he'd had to do before. He had enough time to say "shit" when Eric shot him, from the bed, with a rifle. This part of my family are hunters, the shot was right through the heart and my uncle died instantly. He didn't even bleed that much.
After the shot, my cousin left the house to go to an AA meeting. The next day he phoned the police to let them know that he killed my uncle in self defense.
i don't know why i wanted to share this. i've talked about it to one of my close friends, so it isn't like i just needed to say it.
i guess i thought you could relate to the weirdness of it.
i needed to post this somewhere, and once again, this was the only place, no one close enough to know, would react in a way, that could send repercussions through the lives of those who have to live with it...
oui sil te plait!
