age: 40 (Feb 14, 1973)

MEMBER SINCE: June 2006

occupation: Tip Jockey: jocking for tips

makes me sad: the original ending of E.T. "...I'll-be-right-heerre." Niagara Falls every single time

stats: I'm 10 feet tall when I'm drunk.

crush: Sarah Palin (because mavericks swallow)

gets me hot: "...quit yer crying put yer clown britches on."

most humbling moment: I am made up of the same decaying matter as the rest of you chumps.

into: Good movies, Bad movies, Reading books that are way over my head, tying blondes to railroad tracks while twisting my pencil thin mustache, maniacal laughter, the word "curses" being used as a cuss word, Sharks, Sharks with Laser beams attached to their friggin heads, despots, taking long walks on the beach and tennis.

body mods: a tattoo of a wizard looking at a unicorn in a crystal ball, all inside of a dream catcher on my lower back.

i lost my virginity: and then it found me again, dammit. I tried to loose it on the back streets only to have it meet me at my house. I'm seriously considering a restraining order!

makes me happy: to crush your enemies. to see them driven before you and to hear the lamentation of the women.

fantasy: taping hamsters to the insides of my thighs while running naked through laundromats.