I am writing to you from the comfort of my new apartment's living room. Ed is watching Japanese cartoons on OnDemand and ironing our work clothes, and I am listening to the sound of the dishwasher. Our bedroom looks like clothes chaos right now, and there's still boxes and belongings randomly strewn about the living room and dining room, but I am so goddamn happy. 
For those of you that wish to keep in touch after this coming weekend, I can be found:
on AIM as xbakedgoodsx
on myspace with the email catEWA@aol.com, though this email address itself is long dead
on livejournal at www.livejournal.com/users/btyrhrtout
on assorted email pages as xbaked_goodsx@hotmail.com
at my home address, if any of you who live near the 19044 zip code (a) have spoken to me before and (b) are not too creepy.
For those of you that wish to keep in touch after this coming weekend, I can be found:
on AIM as xbakedgoodsx
on myspace with the email catEWA@aol.com, though this email address itself is long dead
on livejournal at www.livejournal.com/users/btyrhrtout
on assorted email pages as xbaked_goodsx@hotmail.com
at my home address, if any of you who live near the 19044 zip code (a) have spoken to me before and (b) are not too creepy.
Fuck yeah. Better late than never, right?
This, with Final Drive, is one of my rejected interviews. I am, in all honesty, still upset that this one never made it "live", as I was actually very proud of the finished product. And because those kids were just so damned awesome. Seriously, they were the nicest bunch you could ever imagine. I feel like balls because I wasn't able to get the interview published.
I wish them all the luck in the world and hope they make a million fucking dollars. Rock out.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Crazy Donkey is a sparsely furnished, parquet-floored nightclub across the highway from Long Islands MacArthur Airport. Sure, the bartender looks a lot like Lita Ford, but the big room lacks the sticky grossness on the floor and the smoky haze that I have grown accustomed to over the years. Before I have a chance to ponder the true hardcore nature of the venue, I find myself being led away to a tiny basement room, packed to the gills with tall guys sporting dark clothes and impressive facial hair, and big plastic tubs stuffed with ice and beverages. In am empty space between the coat rack and some pipes is Final Drive, the Missouri-based act that has been generating quite a buzz since being featured on the MTV oeuvre Battle For Ozzfest.
Only twenty-four hours after a disappointing jaunt to Washington, DC, where the band was met with little more than inaugural roadblocks and miles of backed-up traffic, these road warriors have traveled 400 miles in the space of hours to play a show with friends Sicks Deep and Trauma Concept. They have agreed to meet with me for a bit before the show, since we missed our opportunity to chat after the Satyricon cancellation debacle in December.
Guitarist Nathan Easter, the strangely charming, cowboy-hatted guitarist and Andy Becker, the low-key drummer, have known each other since they attended the same grade school. A few years later, with the help of original bassist Casey Logue and well-spoken guitarist Chris Nanney, Final Drive was born. Mutual friend Pat Martin introduced the vocal power, which came in the form of high-energy Jordan Gaw, who swaggers about onstage like Axl Rose in his prime. When Casey quit the band this past summer, Chelsea Muckerman stepped in with bass in hand to fill the void. She ultimately was chosen to represent Final Drive on MTV, and speaks about the experience with grace and good humor. Though this line-up has only been playing together less than six months, they seem genuinely happy in each others company, both offstage and on.
Mr. and Mrs. Osbourne certainly had their work cut out for them when it came time to select someone to represent Final Drive on Battle For Ozzfest. Each member of the group brings something unique to the table, evident even in the mere 40 minutes I spent in their company. Mesh together these personalities and a fivefold penchant for playing highly kick-ass music, and you can tell that these kids, along with their exceptional manager Monster, are going to conquer the world in approximately 36 seconds. And it couldnt be done by a nicer group of rockers.
Catherine Flecker: Im assuming that this past year has been pretty crazy, with the change in line-up, the release of the album, the touring, being on television, etc. Looking back to when you first started playing music, is this something that you expected to happen, or have you surpassed your own expectations?
Andy Becker: Well, I always knew that this would happen. (nods)
Chris Nanney: You fucking asshole. (laughs)
Jordan Gaw: Well, as far as whats to be expected, who ever really knows? Right now were working hard, doing what we want to do. We dont have any expectations of whats to come, but were certainly not ruling anything out, either.
Nathan Easter: Well said.
CF: How has being part on an MTV series changed your fan base? Do you find that the people attending your shows now are a younger crowd, the 15-year-old Hot Topic set?
CN: Its probably the same people, just more. We have been getting a younger crowd too, a lot of hits on the website from younger kids, telling us how much they love our music and want us to keep going.
Chelsea Muckerman: Or come play a show where they live.
JG: Oh yeah, its kids from all over the place Finland, I think. Australia.
CM: Puerto Rico.
JG: Yeah, Puerto Rico. People from all over, and everything that they say is so well appreciated.
CF: Even though Battle For Ozzfest didnt focus that much on the musical aspect of the Ozzfest tour, do you look at what made it to television and find that it accurately portrays life on the road for a metal act?
CM: We didnt really get to experience that, honestly. If it had been [more true to life], I wouldnt have been there without the guys, getting homesick for them and missing playing with the rest of the band. In general though, we got to see the harder side of what it takes to put on a show. We got to do the work, do the sound, the lights, all of that sort of stuff.
JG: Its too bad that it wasnt more about the music, but I guess [MTV] had to get good ratings so they can sell shit so they can pay shit.
NE: And shit, and all that shit.
CF: (straining to hear over the din of background conversations) Im sorry, what did you say?
JG: Oh, you gotta watch out for that guy, hes got a cowboy hat on, you never know whats going to come out of his mouth. (everyone laughs)
CF: I hate to seem like Im singling you out, Chelsea, but I think youll be able to answer this more accurately. Were any of the bands on the Ozzfest tour especially supportive? Or did you get the vibe that they were looking at you guys like pay your dues? I dont mean these bands (gestures across the room to Trauma Concept and Sicks Deep), but others who were actually playing on the tour.
CM: There was a bit of controversy with a few of the bands, yeah. They were pretty much seeing as little amateur kids that didnt need to be back there with everybody, being in everybodys way. But as we actually showed up and did the work that we had to do, like the stagehands told us, when people saw that we were putting in some 14-hour days like the rest of the crew, we gained a little bit more respect. We had to earn it. If we slipped up even a little bit, that was it, it was all gone and we had to gain it back.
CF: Was there anyone that was particularly helpful that youd like to mention?
CM: The riggers, definitely. Opie, and Rigger Dan, who unfortunately [has since passed away]. The riggers were absolutely amazing. They taught us so much about what it takes exactly to put on a show. Theyll start at 4:30, 5:15 in the morning and wont get done until 11, midnight, one oclock in the morning some nights. They actually showed what it as a person took to get it all done. They were the most helpful. And obviously Big Dave was awesome. Hes the original road dog, he taught us everything like you dont shower, you dont eat, you dont sleep, you dont play until the work gets done. But then when the work was done, we got our benefits from it. He came through with what he said.
CF: Obviously you guys stay in touch with the friends youve made from the show. How did these shows come to be, and do you plan on having more with other bands that were on Battle For Ozzfest?
JG: We would like to do more. These dates with Sicks Deep and Trauma Concept worked out really well with everyones schedule, and it helped that theyre both from [the East Coast]. I think well be seeing Manntis in California, but thats it. Well be out doing our thing, and if anyone else wants to catch up, great, well see them then, but if not well, there you go.
CF: Do you feel as though the experience on Battle For Ozzfest has changed your band dynamic at all?
NE: Can you rephrase that?
CF: Do you think that the public sees your band more along the lines of Chelsea & Final Drive?
NE: Oh. Yup. (there is a momentary silence before everyone laughs)
CN: They see her face on TV, and well utilize publicity like that to get our band known. It all works out.
AB: It cant be avoided, so fuck it.
CF: What is going on with you guys now? You just released an album in the fall, so what projects are you working on right now?
CM: Were in the middle of a project right now. Were going to be on tour for about 2 and a half months.
JG: Yeah, were just touring, touring, touring and more touring. Were using this opportunity to spread our music around to everyone that we can find. Hopefully thatll keep us going.
CN: Were working on writing some new things. And touring. And thats it.
NE: Andy and I are working on a project--
AB: Yeah, were going to be doing some mouth music with Kansas.
CF: Looking back on the nightclub shooting that killed Pantera founding member Dimebag Darrell Abbott, do you find yourselves more aware of what is happening in the crowd while youre onstage? Do you ever worry that something like that could happen again?
NE: I was actually thinking about that recently. But, if youre going to get shot well, youre going to get shot. And if you get shot in the head onstage while playing guitar, well at least youre dying doing what you love. (there is a unanimous declaration of agreement to this statement)
CF: Who are your musical influences?
CM: It goes across the board, the music that I like. Pantera, A Perfect Circle, Tool. I like almost everything. I dont dig rap all that much, and Im not a big country fan, but I can listen to just about anything.
JG: Guns N Roses
CN: Deftones were always a really big influence on me, especially right when they came out. Its going to sounds cliché now, but Pantera. How could you not love Dimebag, or the band in general? Im getting influenced by a lot of the new hardcore bands coming out, like Unearth, Every Time I Die, Bleeding Through. And of course you cant ever escape the old shit, because thats where all of this started from anyway. Black Sabbath, Led Zeppelin, Skynyrd-- cant go wrong with Skynyrd. Its so diverse, you can grab a little of something from everybody.
NE: W.A. Mozart, B.B. King, Stevie Ray Vaughn. Hmm, lets see all of the above, such as Pantera. Alice In Chains. Thats about it, off the top of my head.
AB: Ive got nothing that anyone hasnt already said.
CM: Well really listen to most of the same stuff. On the road, well listen to Guns N Roses for an hour, then A Perfect Circle or Hatebreed. We dig a lot of the same stuff. We all respect the classics, and get into a lot of the new stuff thats coming out now.
CF: Is there anything I havent already asked that you guys would like to discuss?
JG: If anyone would like us to come play a show in their town, just get in contact with us and well try our best to come out and see you.
NE: And donations are accepted by Gibson--Flying V, to be exact-- ESP guitars, Pearl drums, Zildjian cymbals, Galle and Krueger bass cabinets and bass rigs, DR strings, Dunlop picks, and Beta 58 wireless microphones.
Final Drive is currently on the road until mid-March, promoting their new album Good Things Come To Those Who Refuse To Wait. For tour dates, booking information, and to purchase the album or any of the bands other highly rad swag, be sure to check out www.finaldrive.org
This, with Final Drive, is one of my rejected interviews. I am, in all honesty, still upset that this one never made it "live", as I was actually very proud of the finished product. And because those kids were just so damned awesome. Seriously, they were the nicest bunch you could ever imagine. I feel like balls because I wasn't able to get the interview published.
I wish them all the luck in the world and hope they make a million fucking dollars. Rock out.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Crazy Donkey is a sparsely furnished, parquet-floored nightclub across the highway from Long Islands MacArthur Airport. Sure, the bartender looks a lot like Lita Ford, but the big room lacks the sticky grossness on the floor and the smoky haze that I have grown accustomed to over the years. Before I have a chance to ponder the true hardcore nature of the venue, I find myself being led away to a tiny basement room, packed to the gills with tall guys sporting dark clothes and impressive facial hair, and big plastic tubs stuffed with ice and beverages. In am empty space between the coat rack and some pipes is Final Drive, the Missouri-based act that has been generating quite a buzz since being featured on the MTV oeuvre Battle For Ozzfest.
Only twenty-four hours after a disappointing jaunt to Washington, DC, where the band was met with little more than inaugural roadblocks and miles of backed-up traffic, these road warriors have traveled 400 miles in the space of hours to play a show with friends Sicks Deep and Trauma Concept. They have agreed to meet with me for a bit before the show, since we missed our opportunity to chat after the Satyricon cancellation debacle in December.
Guitarist Nathan Easter, the strangely charming, cowboy-hatted guitarist and Andy Becker, the low-key drummer, have known each other since they attended the same grade school. A few years later, with the help of original bassist Casey Logue and well-spoken guitarist Chris Nanney, Final Drive was born. Mutual friend Pat Martin introduced the vocal power, which came in the form of high-energy Jordan Gaw, who swaggers about onstage like Axl Rose in his prime. When Casey quit the band this past summer, Chelsea Muckerman stepped in with bass in hand to fill the void. She ultimately was chosen to represent Final Drive on MTV, and speaks about the experience with grace and good humor. Though this line-up has only been playing together less than six months, they seem genuinely happy in each others company, both offstage and on.
Mr. and Mrs. Osbourne certainly had their work cut out for them when it came time to select someone to represent Final Drive on Battle For Ozzfest. Each member of the group brings something unique to the table, evident even in the mere 40 minutes I spent in their company. Mesh together these personalities and a fivefold penchant for playing highly kick-ass music, and you can tell that these kids, along with their exceptional manager Monster, are going to conquer the world in approximately 36 seconds. And it couldnt be done by a nicer group of rockers.
Catherine Flecker: Im assuming that this past year has been pretty crazy, with the change in line-up, the release of the album, the touring, being on television, etc. Looking back to when you first started playing music, is this something that you expected to happen, or have you surpassed your own expectations?
Andy Becker: Well, I always knew that this would happen. (nods)
Chris Nanney: You fucking asshole. (laughs)
Jordan Gaw: Well, as far as whats to be expected, who ever really knows? Right now were working hard, doing what we want to do. We dont have any expectations of whats to come, but were certainly not ruling anything out, either.
Nathan Easter: Well said.
CF: How has being part on an MTV series changed your fan base? Do you find that the people attending your shows now are a younger crowd, the 15-year-old Hot Topic set?
CN: Its probably the same people, just more. We have been getting a younger crowd too, a lot of hits on the website from younger kids, telling us how much they love our music and want us to keep going.
Chelsea Muckerman: Or come play a show where they live.
JG: Oh yeah, its kids from all over the place Finland, I think. Australia.
CM: Puerto Rico.
JG: Yeah, Puerto Rico. People from all over, and everything that they say is so well appreciated.
CF: Even though Battle For Ozzfest didnt focus that much on the musical aspect of the Ozzfest tour, do you look at what made it to television and find that it accurately portrays life on the road for a metal act?
CM: We didnt really get to experience that, honestly. If it had been [more true to life], I wouldnt have been there without the guys, getting homesick for them and missing playing with the rest of the band. In general though, we got to see the harder side of what it takes to put on a show. We got to do the work, do the sound, the lights, all of that sort of stuff.
JG: Its too bad that it wasnt more about the music, but I guess [MTV] had to get good ratings so they can sell shit so they can pay shit.
NE: And shit, and all that shit.
CF: (straining to hear over the din of background conversations) Im sorry, what did you say?
JG: Oh, you gotta watch out for that guy, hes got a cowboy hat on, you never know whats going to come out of his mouth. (everyone laughs)
CF: I hate to seem like Im singling you out, Chelsea, but I think youll be able to answer this more accurately. Were any of the bands on the Ozzfest tour especially supportive? Or did you get the vibe that they were looking at you guys like pay your dues? I dont mean these bands (gestures across the room to Trauma Concept and Sicks Deep), but others who were actually playing on the tour.
CM: There was a bit of controversy with a few of the bands, yeah. They were pretty much seeing as little amateur kids that didnt need to be back there with everybody, being in everybodys way. But as we actually showed up and did the work that we had to do, like the stagehands told us, when people saw that we were putting in some 14-hour days like the rest of the crew, we gained a little bit more respect. We had to earn it. If we slipped up even a little bit, that was it, it was all gone and we had to gain it back.
CF: Was there anyone that was particularly helpful that youd like to mention?
CM: The riggers, definitely. Opie, and Rigger Dan, who unfortunately [has since passed away]. The riggers were absolutely amazing. They taught us so much about what it takes exactly to put on a show. Theyll start at 4:30, 5:15 in the morning and wont get done until 11, midnight, one oclock in the morning some nights. They actually showed what it as a person took to get it all done. They were the most helpful. And obviously Big Dave was awesome. Hes the original road dog, he taught us everything like you dont shower, you dont eat, you dont sleep, you dont play until the work gets done. But then when the work was done, we got our benefits from it. He came through with what he said.
CF: Obviously you guys stay in touch with the friends youve made from the show. How did these shows come to be, and do you plan on having more with other bands that were on Battle For Ozzfest?
JG: We would like to do more. These dates with Sicks Deep and Trauma Concept worked out really well with everyones schedule, and it helped that theyre both from [the East Coast]. I think well be seeing Manntis in California, but thats it. Well be out doing our thing, and if anyone else wants to catch up, great, well see them then, but if not well, there you go.
CF: Do you feel as though the experience on Battle For Ozzfest has changed your band dynamic at all?
NE: Can you rephrase that?
CF: Do you think that the public sees your band more along the lines of Chelsea & Final Drive?
NE: Oh. Yup. (there is a momentary silence before everyone laughs)
CN: They see her face on TV, and well utilize publicity like that to get our band known. It all works out.
AB: It cant be avoided, so fuck it.
CF: What is going on with you guys now? You just released an album in the fall, so what projects are you working on right now?
CM: Were in the middle of a project right now. Were going to be on tour for about 2 and a half months.
JG: Yeah, were just touring, touring, touring and more touring. Were using this opportunity to spread our music around to everyone that we can find. Hopefully thatll keep us going.
CN: Were working on writing some new things. And touring. And thats it.
NE: Andy and I are working on a project--
AB: Yeah, were going to be doing some mouth music with Kansas.
CF: Looking back on the nightclub shooting that killed Pantera founding member Dimebag Darrell Abbott, do you find yourselves more aware of what is happening in the crowd while youre onstage? Do you ever worry that something like that could happen again?
NE: I was actually thinking about that recently. But, if youre going to get shot well, youre going to get shot. And if you get shot in the head onstage while playing guitar, well at least youre dying doing what you love. (there is a unanimous declaration of agreement to this statement)
CF: Who are your musical influences?
CM: It goes across the board, the music that I like. Pantera, A Perfect Circle, Tool. I like almost everything. I dont dig rap all that much, and Im not a big country fan, but I can listen to just about anything.
JG: Guns N Roses
CN: Deftones were always a really big influence on me, especially right when they came out. Its going to sounds cliché now, but Pantera. How could you not love Dimebag, or the band in general? Im getting influenced by a lot of the new hardcore bands coming out, like Unearth, Every Time I Die, Bleeding Through. And of course you cant ever escape the old shit, because thats where all of this started from anyway. Black Sabbath, Led Zeppelin, Skynyrd-- cant go wrong with Skynyrd. Its so diverse, you can grab a little of something from everybody.
NE: W.A. Mozart, B.B. King, Stevie Ray Vaughn. Hmm, lets see all of the above, such as Pantera. Alice In Chains. Thats about it, off the top of my head.
AB: Ive got nothing that anyone hasnt already said.
CM: Well really listen to most of the same stuff. On the road, well listen to Guns N Roses for an hour, then A Perfect Circle or Hatebreed. We dig a lot of the same stuff. We all respect the classics, and get into a lot of the new stuff thats coming out now.
CF: Is there anything I havent already asked that you guys would like to discuss?
JG: If anyone would like us to come play a show in their town, just get in contact with us and well try our best to come out and see you.
NE: And donations are accepted by Gibson--Flying V, to be exact-- ESP guitars, Pearl drums, Zildjian cymbals, Galle and Krueger bass cabinets and bass rigs, DR strings, Dunlop picks, and Beta 58 wireless microphones.
Final Drive is currently on the road until mid-March, promoting their new album Good Things Come To Those Who Refuse To Wait. For tour dates, booking information, and to purchase the album or any of the bands other highly rad swag, be sure to check out www.finaldrive.org
Today I was packing breakable things. I went to my parent's house to steal this weeks' newspapers, and came home to attend to padding the vases and picture frames and things. By chance, I happened to notice that reality (the teen section of the county paper) is holding a tenth anniversary reunion. Since I am sucker for meaningless nostalgia, and because I joined the panel seven years ago (!
!) and ended in 2000, I called the current editor for more info.
Now that I have hung up, I wonder what the reunion will be like. I know that one of my friends from that time, who was also on the panel, is some associate editor at Teen People. There are the others, who went to places like Northwestern and Amherst and majored in things like literature and English. It will be a whole thing, about who is more successful and who has had more things published.
I got kicked off the SuicideGirls newswire, I will tell them. I have had one interview published on a porn site, and two others that have been rejected. I got married young and had a child, and I am in a better place now than I ever imagined when I sat here with you six years ago, when we turned our awkward high school angst into verbose rants published in a pullout section of the newspaper, rants that embarassed our parents and made us think that we were the voice of a generation. I can't write fiction anymore unless it's thinly veiled truth. In fact, I will say I don't do much writing at all these days, unless it's a grocery list or helping my daughter learn her ABCs or my occasional boring blog that I keep just to clear the cobwebs. And I miss it sometimes, and maybe I am a little jealous of you, but in summation, I am happy for you and I want you to be the voice of me, of us, of those who are a product of this place.
I don't have much more time here, maybe two weeks. Before I go, I want to the interviews that I did that got rejected. Look for the first one tomorrow.
!) and ended in 2000, I called the current editor for more info.Now that I have hung up, I wonder what the reunion will be like. I know that one of my friends from that time, who was also on the panel, is some associate editor at Teen People. There are the others, who went to places like Northwestern and Amherst and majored in things like literature and English. It will be a whole thing, about who is more successful and who has had more things published.
I got kicked off the SuicideGirls newswire, I will tell them. I have had one interview published on a porn site, and two others that have been rejected. I got married young and had a child, and I am in a better place now than I ever imagined when I sat here with you six years ago, when we turned our awkward high school angst into verbose rants published in a pullout section of the newspaper, rants that embarassed our parents and made us think that we were the voice of a generation. I can't write fiction anymore unless it's thinly veiled truth. In fact, I will say I don't do much writing at all these days, unless it's a grocery list or helping my daughter learn her ABCs or my occasional boring blog that I keep just to clear the cobwebs. And I miss it sometimes, and maybe I am a little jealous of you, but in summation, I am happy for you and I want you to be the voice of me, of us, of those who are a product of this place.
I don't have much more time here, maybe two weeks. Before I go, I want to the interviews that I did that got rejected. Look for the first one tomorrow.
So, I had this dream the other night about the male doctor at our practice. Ya know, the guy who's my frigging boss. And while I don't remember much about it, I do know that today I went in and totally wanted to make out with him. 
Along with the myriad other problems with this particular scenario, he is approximately three inches shorter than me.
Today was my kid's birthday. My husband stayed home from work so they could spend the day with his parents, who drove my insane from yesterday evening until they left around 3. But she had a nice day, and we came home and had birthday cake with my parents and took her out on her new tricycle. It's going to be weird not living around here.
Ohmyfuggingawd, I'm so stressed. I have totally been dragging my feet with packing, and now I have ten days left and no time to do it. I'm overwhelmed, so I don't know where to start or what to do. Not to mention that I'm the schedule twice thje amount I've been in the past. Yay for full-time and all, but non-yay for starting it before July fifth (the day I return to work after the move.) Does anyone have any advice?
Anger_frog is leaving us, and that saddens me.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
An Open Letter To Those Who Attempt to Break Into My Car To Find Money For Crack:
Please remember that busting apart the center console isn't really worth the effort if you can't figure out how to remove the stereo. And thank you for not damaging my Distillers CD in the process.
Next time, maybe you should take the title of the car that I foolishly kept in the glove box. That way, you can take the car and sell it to a dealership. Not that many dealerships would want my 1991 Lumina, but at least you could try.
I hope that you get alot of money for my 6-pack of Diet Pepsi and my Clorox 2 laundry detergent, and my husband's scratched-up Busta Rhymes CD.
Even though you didn't get much from rifling through my personal belongings, it still skeeves me out that you touched things that I own, and had your grimy paws on my kid's car seat. I don't know what your assorted problems are, but I hope one day you find relief from them. Until that time, I hope you enjoyed the bloody tampon that you found under the passenger seat.
Sincerely,
Squiddy
PS-- I've never been so glad that I forgot to throw something gross out.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Reason #867 That I Am Glad To Be Leaving: Last Wednesday, I was taking the car to get a new muffler, and I saw some guy behind me in a BMW beating the shit out of a woman in the front seat next to him. A cop car drove right by, was five feet away, and didn't do a thing, yet a month ago had no problem pulling my husband over and writing him tickets totalling $400 dollars for having a broken taillight and expried inspection.
These are the same cops who think it's perfectly perfect to let 15 year old kids have access to firearms while working unattended in the local ice cream shop, but can't be bothered to respond to my 911 call at 3 in the morning when someone was trying to break into my neighbor's house. 
===================================
I got an email today from one of the guys from my favorite TV show Crabbing vessels rock my world.
Does anyone want to buy me "Holy Roller" by The Reverend Horton Heat? I'll make it worth your while, perhaps with brownies.
Oh, yesterday we drove out to show the in-laws our new town, and we saw a genuine Baptist tent meeting. I was shocked and awed.
Along with the myriad other problems with this particular scenario, he is approximately three inches shorter than me. Today was my kid's birthday. My husband stayed home from work so they could spend the day with his parents, who drove my insane from yesterday evening until they left around 3. But she had a nice day, and we came home and had birthday cake with my parents and took her out on her new tricycle. It's going to be weird not living around here.
Ohmyfuggingawd, I'm so stressed. I have totally been dragging my feet with packing, and now I have ten days left and no time to do it. I'm overwhelmed, so I don't know where to start or what to do. Not to mention that I'm the schedule twice thje amount I've been in the past. Yay for full-time and all, but non-yay for starting it before July fifth (the day I return to work after the move.) Does anyone have any advice?
Anger_frog is leaving us, and that saddens me.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
An Open Letter To Those Who Attempt to Break Into My Car To Find Money For Crack:
Please remember that busting apart the center console isn't really worth the effort if you can't figure out how to remove the stereo. And thank you for not damaging my Distillers CD in the process.
Next time, maybe you should take the title of the car that I foolishly kept in the glove box. That way, you can take the car and sell it to a dealership. Not that many dealerships would want my 1991 Lumina, but at least you could try.
I hope that you get alot of money for my 6-pack of Diet Pepsi and my Clorox 2 laundry detergent, and my husband's scratched-up Busta Rhymes CD.
Even though you didn't get much from rifling through my personal belongings, it still skeeves me out that you touched things that I own, and had your grimy paws on my kid's car seat. I don't know what your assorted problems are, but I hope one day you find relief from them. Until that time, I hope you enjoyed the bloody tampon that you found under the passenger seat.
Sincerely,
Squiddy
PS-- I've never been so glad that I forgot to throw something gross out.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Reason #867 That I Am Glad To Be Leaving: Last Wednesday, I was taking the car to get a new muffler, and I saw some guy behind me in a BMW beating the shit out of a woman in the front seat next to him. A cop car drove right by, was five feet away, and didn't do a thing, yet a month ago had no problem pulling my husband over and writing him tickets totalling $400 dollars for having a broken taillight and expried inspection.
These are the same cops who think it's perfectly perfect to let 15 year old kids have access to firearms while working unattended in the local ice cream shop, but can't be bothered to respond to my 911 call at 3 in the morning when someone was trying to break into my neighbor's house. ===================================
I got an email today from one of the guys from my favorite TV show
Crabbing vessels rock my world.Does anyone want to buy me "Holy Roller" by The Reverend Horton Heat? I'll make it worth your while, perhaps with brownies.
Oh, yesterday we drove out to show the in-laws our new town, and we saw a genuine Baptist tent meeting.
I was shocked and awed.Things to do tomorrow on my day off:
1. get eyebrows waxed, as they currently resemble caterpillers
2. go to Wal-Mart
3. drop off husband's court summons, so as to not have him arrested, and drop off the car, so as to not go one more day with shitty brakes
4. pack the kitchen, for the love of GOD pack the kitchen
5. momentarily rejoice in the fact that I will not be working, no matter what happens to someone else at work
6. wonder briefly if I should go into work
7. shake my head and remind myself that no, I only have 16 more days to pack, and I'm not even a quarter of the way done
8. promise myself that I won't be this fat next year
9. drink two cans of Pepsi anyway
10. weep because Deadliest Catch won't be on anymore
11. wonder when I became so boring that my journal entries don't even consist of full sentences
12. pick up the little one from daycare and rejoice in the fact that she is so entertaining.
13. call husband to remind him how wonderful our child is, and remind him to bring home dinner.
14. go to bed wondering how I got nothing accomplished, and vow to myself that I will pack the baby's room on Thursday before work
Guess what! I bought an ugly sofabed off Craigslist for 20 dollars!
1. get eyebrows waxed, as they currently resemble caterpillers
2. go to Wal-Mart
3. drop off husband's court summons, so as to not have him arrested, and drop off the car, so as to not go one more day with shitty brakes
4. pack the kitchen, for the love of GOD pack the kitchen
5. momentarily rejoice in the fact that I will not be working, no matter what happens to someone else at work
6. wonder briefly if I should go into work
7. shake my head and remind myself that no, I only have 16 more days to pack, and I'm not even a quarter of the way done
8. promise myself that I won't be this fat next year
9. drink two cans of Pepsi anyway
10. weep because Deadliest Catch won't be on anymore
11. wonder when I became so boring that my journal entries don't even consist of full sentences
12. pick up the little one from daycare and rejoice in the fact that she is so entertaining.
13. call husband to remind him how wonderful our child is, and remind him to bring home dinner.
14. go to bed wondering how I got nothing accomplished, and vow to myself that I will pack the baby's room on Thursday before work
Guess what! I bought an ugly sofabed off Craigslist for 20 dollars!
Sixteen days until the move. We're barely half packed. It still seems really far away, and it's hard to motivate myself when it's 87 degrees in here.
One of the girls at work is having trouble. She's ten weeks pregnant and not doing well. So I've been covereing her shifts. Couple that with the fact that the last two weeks at the office have been rather hellish, what with hordes of patients who want everything done for them five minutes ago, and you find me exhausted and wanting to call out tonight so I can see the last episode of Deadliest Catch. But I won't. At least I'm scheduled for the front desk tonight, which is easier than working the phone lines or assisting the doctors.
I keep finding these things that remind me of my former life. Especially wrestling pictures. And I miss it. Sometimes I think I grew up too fast, and miss those two blissful years I had of being mature enough to do whatever I wanted when I wasn't at work, and being silly enough to spend that time exploring abandoned buildings, having sex, and learning a fake sport. I also miss not being disgustingly fat.
My journal entries are total downers.
One of the girls at work is having trouble. She's ten weeks pregnant and not doing well. So I've been covereing her shifts. Couple that with the fact that the last two weeks at the office have been rather hellish, what with hordes of patients who want everything done for them five minutes ago, and you find me exhausted and wanting to call out tonight so I can see the last episode of Deadliest Catch. But I won't. At least I'm scheduled for the front desk tonight, which is easier than working the phone lines or assisting the doctors.
I keep finding these things that remind me of my former life. Especially wrestling pictures. And I miss it. Sometimes I think I grew up too fast, and miss those two blissful years I had of being mature enough to do whatever I wanted when I wasn't at work, and being silly enough to spend that time exploring abandoned buildings, having sex, and learning a fake sport. I also miss not being disgustingly fat.
My journal entries are total downers.
I update now.
Moving in 21 days. And this week I have already worked 30 hours, even though I was only supposed to be working 18 total. Lots of doubles. Lots of obnoxious patients. Lots of cranky doctors. But lots of extra money, which I can always use. However, all of this extra work is severly cramping my packing style. Hardly anything is set to go. Did I mention there's only 21 days left to go?
The last episode of Deadliest Catch is on next week. I find that to be upsetting. However, there is the five-disc DVD set available on Discovery.com to console me.
It'll be weird not living here. When I moved in to this place, I was a single eighteen year old with two jobs and no ambition. Now I'm a married mother with a degree ( ) and nowhere to go but up. It's crazy to think of how things have changed.
People, I have something to tell you. You *can* write a book about something other than your life. Thanks to all of yo uuinderstand that. And thanks to the current and former strippers who have emailed me and offered to answer my questions. I am in the process of coming up with a few coherenet questions.
Moving in 21 days. And this week I have already worked 30 hours, even though I was only supposed to be working 18 total. Lots of doubles. Lots of obnoxious patients. Lots of cranky doctors. But lots of extra money, which I can always use. However, all of this extra work is severly cramping my packing style. Hardly anything is set to go. Did I mention there's only 21 days left to go?
The last episode of Deadliest Catch is on next week. I find that to be upsetting. However, there is the five-disc DVD set available on Discovery.com to console me.
It'll be weird not living here. When I moved in to this place, I was a single eighteen year old with two jobs and no ambition. Now I'm a married mother with a degree (
) and nowhere to go but up. It's crazy to think of how things have changed.People, I have something to tell you. You *can* write a book about something other than your life. Thanks to all of yo uuinderstand that. And thanks to the current and former strippers who have emailed me and offered to answer my questions. I am in the process of coming up with a few coherenet questions.
